What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

**mrwho** · 09-01-2016

Just yesterday after repairing the fuser of a MP301 and while testing the machine out while on the company of a customer's employee, another one comes I don't know from where and tells that because I was working on the machine all printers disappeared from his computer.

Fortunately the girl accompanying me was computer literate and told him that wasn't possible.

**nottoosharp** · 09-02-2016

The stupidest things ever said by customers:
Me: Did someone take out the fuser? ( holding broken fuser)
Them: no, I don't think anyone here is smart enough to do that.

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**Setright** · 09-06-2016

Having installed a new high-volume digital printer....to replace an older version from a competing brand:

Client, printing on 350gram/m2: "The paper is very warm when it leaves the machine."

Me: "Yes, that's how we fuse toner to the paper, and 350gram/m2 means surface temperature around 200, so that will feel warm."

Client: The old machine didn't heat the paper.

**kingarthur** · 09-06-2016

Had a customer complain that her new bizhub was printing too dark & wanted it lightened, I went around to see her, and said I thought it was perfect, she replied, that her old m/c printed everything in a fuzzy grey and that's what they wanted with their new m/c....

**fixthecopier** · 09-06-2016

We have this customer that is a psyc office. At one point they hired an office manager who was a complete bitch. She wrote a bad online review of our company over some minor bullshit, I think it was over paying overage charges one month. The owner caved and ate the charges but she refused to remove the review. Months later I am delivering toner. The machine is waiting on the black so I installed it. The bitch calls the shop raising hell because when I installed the toner, I somehow caused all of their computers to drop off the network. When I went back a few months later, she had been fired, the girls in the office apologized and removed the bad review.

**gneebore** · 10-29-2016

Originally Posted by Heleric

Customer placed a service call saying no one could print. When I get there I find they all had new computers. Told her I would need to reinstall the print drivers. Computers were all locked down to the point where it was asking for an administrator password to add a printer. I told her she would have to contact her IT for the password. And she said I don't understand why you don't know the password to install the printer, it is your printer isn't it? I said you need the computer password, there is no way I would know the password to your BRAND NEW computers. She got frustrated and asked me to leave. Didn't even leave the parking lot when my boss called and said the customer just called him and told him I was very rude and not at all helpful.

Very long time ago when typewriters could be installed as printers we sold a new electronic typewriter to a company. I went and installed it. Took the manufacturers write protected disk out of the box with the typewriter. Got the (this is how long ago flashback) parallel cable hooked up and put the driver disk in to set up the drivers. Pc does not read disk. I pulled it out and 1/4 inch of dust is on the disk, 5 1/4 floppy btw. Cleaned it off and reinserted the disk and finally the pc read the disk and installed the drivers. However I did notice a weird noise from the hard drive when it was copying the drivers, and when the user pulled up a file to print on the typewriter. I put it on the delivery ticket that they needed their computer tech to check the pc for possible hard drive problems. I made them initial that line on the ticket. Three months later they called and demanded we pay for a new hard drive since I was the last person who installed anything on it and their computer tech (contractor) said it had to be my fault. We refused and they threatened to sue us. Had to point out they were warned to have their computer tech check the hard drive three months ago. Had to have someone from the manufacturer of the typewriter explain their software was certified virus free which is why the drivers were on a write protected disk and there was no known virus that would cause a hard drive to fail to be listed in the bios, like theirs was. It was an equipment failure. We lost a customer over that. And we quit installing printer drivers after that. It was hand the disks over and have the customer do the installation while I watched. Explained it as simply teaching them how to do it on other pc's if they needed to upgrade their computer or swap the typewriter/printer to a different office.

**nmfaxman** · 10-29-2016

Originally Posted by Setright

Having installed a new high-volume digital printer....to replace an older version from a competing brand:

Client, printing on 350gram/m2: "The paper is very warm when it leaves the machine."

Me: "Yes, that's how we fuse toner to the paper, and 350gram/m2 means surface temperature around 200, so that will feel warm."

Client: The old machine didn't heat the paper.

Old machine could have been a Canon 120/125 that used pressure to fuse the toner.
Of course that machine is over 25 years old.
Only cold pressure fusing I can remember after all these years.

**blackcat4866** · 10-29-2016

Originally Posted by nmfaxman

Old machine could have been a Canon 120/125 that used pressure to fuse the toner.
Of course that machine is over 25 years old.
Only cold pressure fusing I can remember after all these years.

Also Mita 500D, 600D, 800D, 900D.

I remember the first call I did on the Canon 120. I'm looking all around the machine (doing the "grope") to find the main power switch. There is no main power switch, just a Start button. I felt particularly foolish right then. =^..^=

**nottoosharp** · 10-29-2016

We had (HAD) a time & material customer that bought a couple Konica Minolta machines online. He insisted he was only going to run b/w because the toner, and color DV prices are stupid high. Close to a grand for color DV. He called for a noise coming from the machine. I'm a sharp guy. It's really all I've trained on, but an mfp is an mfp is an mfp. So I go to work tracking down the issue. I finally track it to the toner pipe. It's been a couple hours, and I can't fix it. Let him know I'll have the boss get back to him. He calls before I can get back to the shop and is throwing a fit. Boss goes to figure out what I did wrong. Turns out this guy has been refilling his toner carts. He drilled holes in them. Well the shavings have made it through the system and clogged them tight.

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**gneebore** · 10-29-2016

Originally Posted by nottoosharp

We had (HAD) a time & material customer that bought a couple Konica Minolta machines online. He insisted he was only going to run b/w because the toner, and color DV prices are stupid high. Close to a grand for color DV. He called for a noise coming from the machine. I'm a sharp guy. It's really all I've trained on, but an mfp is an mfp is an mfp. So I go to work tracking down the issue. I finally track it to the toner pipe. It's been a couple hours, and I can't fix it. Let him know I'll have the boss get back to him. He calls before I can get back to the shop and is throwing a fit. Boss goes to figure out what I did wrong. Turns out this guy has been refilling his toner carts. He drilled holes in them. Well the shavings have made it through the system and clogged them tight.

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Like a customer we had once with a Konica Minolta color copier. They ran out of color toners so went ahead and clipped the lockouts on the black toners and used them instead of the color cartridges. Then had a fit when we gave them the estimate to replace the color developer units. So they just ordered color toners and called an out of town company to come in and fix the poor color quality. I think they eventually did buy a new used machine instead.