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  1. #581
    Senior Tech 250+ Posts Phrag's Avatar
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lagonda View Post
    "You have to fix it NOW, it's a patient critical printer!"





    So has there been a huge medical break through while I wasn't looking and they now use printers as part of a medical procedure?
    So you can't print labels out because you insist on trying use cut price El Cheapo labels and they've now jammed the printer solid?
    Tough, write them out by hand.
    I wonder if they use El Cheapo sutures as well.

  2. #582
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lagonda View Post
    "You have to fix it NOW, it's a patient critical printer!"





    So has there been a huge medical break through while I wasn't looking and they now use printers as part of a medical procedure?
    So you can't print labels out because you insist on trying use cut price El Cheapo labels and they've now jammed the printer solid?
    Tough, write them out by hand.

    Don't talk to me about labels, I'm the sole printer tech at a company that does full computer systems just for Pharmacies. You know, the ones that print labels to go on all your pill bottles. You become very familiar with with the effect poor quality, custom designed labels can do to a printer. On the upside I only have to worry about 4-6 models of printer that I work on at any given time.

  3. #583
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    Quote Originally Posted by Exok View Post
    I used to work on Savin Liquid toner V-35 style machines that would get gummed up with dried out toner in the toner tank gears. The gears would stop turning and the drive belt would make a horrible loud noise. The toner mixes with a clear dispersant fluid that we also use to clean the machines. I keep a squeeze bottle filled with the clear dispersant to service the machines. It was common for these tank gears to get stuck with dried toner and just wetting them with dispersant would fix it.

    Customer, "Our machine is making a horrible loud noise. I really think it's possessed"

    Me, "Possessed you say? I think I can handle that. (take out my dispersant bottle) It's a good thing I remembered to bring my holy water with me. (turns on machine with front door jumped, machine makes loud noise) BEGONE EVIL SPIRIT! (squirts dispersant on the tank gears, noise suddenly stops and machine runs quiet)"

    Customer, "HOLY CRAP!!!!!"

    I wish it were that easy with the Kyocera 4200's when they start making noise.

  4. #584
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    Re: Sure...why not!

    [QUOTE=Jimbo1;60287]You are doing a major PM and the copier is completely gutted.

    Customer walks up..."Could I make just one copy???????"

    That's when I back up and say "Sure go right ahead".

  5. #585
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    Quote Originally Posted by shamgar1981 View Post
    Don't talk to me about labels, I'm the sole printer tech at a company that does full computer systems just for Pharmacies. You know, the ones that print labels to go on all your pill bottles. You become very familiar with with the effect poor quality, custom designed labels can do to a printer. On the upside I only have to worry about 4-6 models of printer that I work on at any given time.
    Got to thinking about this and gummed labels in copiers and a story a friend told me. There is a brand of label sheets to be used in printers. You can print an entire sheet of twenty labels at once in a desktop HP printer. Box actually had a warning not to use in high speed copies or printers. Well one customer decided to print fifty sheets of them on a Sharp color copier. Guess what peeled off on the transfer belt, two drums and of course the fuser and feed tray pick up rollers. He had to replace the separation belt assembly, the two drums and could clean the fuser snf feed rolls. The really stupid part was three weeks later the very same customer had a volunteer that ignored the printed warning on the front of the copier to "DO NOT PUT LABEL SHEETS IN COPIER," because she needed to make fifty sheets of labels for mailing again. And of course it did the same thing. The customer was not very happy when informed they were paying for the parts because they ignored the warning to not use the copier to use to print labels.

  6. #586
    Service Manager 1,000+ Posts
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    After dealing with weeks of troubleshooting an Autostore issue, and of course, all the blame being placed on our shoulders, I was logging into a server to continue our efforts when I got "your account has been locked out "message. I asked the IT guy to reset the account and questioned why it had been locked in the 1st place. He says Oh it's probably just my Russian friends trying to hack into our system (large law firm)". I laughed at this and he says No I'm not kidding. Turns out this account (service account mind you) gets locked out several times per day, sometimes 1/2 dozen times, and each time it shuts downs the AS services. After weeks of this it never occurred to him to mention this. Emujo

  7. #587
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    I provide this out of order sign to my customers, to cut down on dumb questions.




    -DEVICE IS OUT OF ORDER
    -

    YES – We have called for service
    YES – They will be here soon.
    NO – We don't know how to fix it.
    NO – We don't know who broke it.
    YES – We are keeping it.
    NO – We don't know what you are going to do now.

    -WARNING MACHINE SUBJECT TO BREAKDOWN DURING PERIODS OF CRITICAL NEED
    A special circuit, known as the crisis detector, detects the emotional state of the operator. It produces a malfunction proportional to the need at that time. Threatening the machine with violence or the use of obscenities may soothe the user, but will only aggravate the situation. Likewise, attempts to use another machine may cause it to malfunction because they belong to the same union.
    The crisis detector is reset when the service technician arrives and asks about the symptoms of the malfunction, at which time the device will work perfectly.
    Keep calm and say nice things to the machine. Nothing else seems to work!

  8. #588
    Junior Member DBToner's Avatar
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    Quote Originally Posted by SGT_Snacks-64 View Post
    "Is it broken?" When you have everything out of the copier, screwdriver in your hand, replacing a hot roller is still a classic.
    I usually tell them no it is not broke it is taken apart there is a differences.

  9. #589
    worker drone 250+ Posts
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    When asked "is that thing broken again"? I respond with "there seems to be some debate on whether is it broken again or it is broken still".

  10. #590
    Field Supervisor 500+ Posts
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    Not a working tech any more, retired last year. But when out and about at a mall doing some shopping for books I over heard a really good discussion about another old topic. The "why do those hinges break all the time" Then he explained they break when you open the document feeder and push the top corner against the wall behind the machine. Which is why we required at least six inches between the wall and the back of the machine. Then I heard him when he pointed and told the manager where the covers were also scratching the paint and even put a small hole in the wall where the document feed corners where hitting the wall. Seems she did not want to hear that because the front of the copier had to line up with the front of filing cabinets. He quite simply told the customer that the hinges were not covered under contract or warranty since he had a copy of a prior service ticket that had in writing "the customer has been informed to not push the machine flat against the wall. Doing so will bend the hinges when the document feeder is lifted and the corners hit the wall" And of course I hung around long enough to over hear several "how much longer before it's fixed" And "we never had these problems with our old copier"

    Just how dumb do you have to be to ignore a written instruction to not push a machine against the wall?

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