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  1. #691
    Senior Tech 250+ Posts
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    Quote Originally Posted by roho View Post
    I HAVE HAD some one try to run duplex transparencies...... analogue days at a Provincial government office, University educated no doubt. Asked me in a upset tone why the copier had no settings for 2 sided transparency.
    There was one school here that actually did duplex a set of transparencies in an early hp 4 duplex printer. Because it could duplex and they wold save money by using half the transparencies printed single sided. We were not the service company for them on that printer. A friend of mine was and he had a riot telling me how they complained they could not read the transparencies when they put them in the overhead projector. He actually had to take a clear sheet and draw on both sides with a felt tip pen and show them what they were trying do with the printed transparencies. One dingbat actually argued with him that they were only showing one side at a time. So why does show the one on the bottom alomg with the top of the page? And people wonder why the kids are not learning anything

  2. #692
    Senior Tech. 2,500+ Posts NeoMatrix's Avatar
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    Quote Originally Posted by Bix View Post
    Only my customers come to me asking for advice on how to repair their microwave because I'm able to repair the printer?


    Yesterday a customer asked me if seeing a 1080p movie on a 720p display could burn the pixels
    Re. Pixel burns
    Seriously....?

    I would have said to the customer,all those cute and cuddly animals on the display have pixel burns on them.
    You'd better ring the RSPCA, an inform them about pixel burn cruelty to animals...
    What if we could count the stars... , what number would you stop at...?"
    [Exchange manual acquisitions, PM's CTN members only. ]
    [] |N | | o | M | Δ | t | π | | x | []

  3. #693
    Senior Tech 100+ Posts
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    My favorite of recent is everyone in office can print/scan except Dick. So Dick calls us to fix the copier because he can't print/scan. This is an IT issue Dick, have you spoken to your IT dept? He argues his computer is working better than ever with everything and being it is a print/scan issue it must be the copier at fault. Tell you what Dick, I will check the copier and fix your print/scan issue, however, if I have to do anything on your computer or network, it is billable, how does that sound? Not acceptable after all they have a maintenance plan. I arrive, look at machine log. Nothing wrong with copier Dick, do you want to print/scan? I would like to adjust your computer Dick, do you want to roll the dice? If I can get you to print/scan you will be charged, if not, no charge. GUESS WHAT???

    That chicken Sh!t, said guess I will have IT check into it further. BTW Dick is not the real name, just the nickname I gave him.
    Sex with my wife is like driving a Ferarri at 190 m.p.h.






    Yeah, I don't get to do that either

  4. #694
    worker drone 250+ Posts
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    Quote Originally Posted by tonerhead View Post
    My favorite of recent is everyone in office can print/scan except Dick. So Dick calls us to fix the copier because he can't print/scan. This is an IT issue Dick, have you spoken to your IT dept? He argues his computer is working better than ever with everything and being it is a print/scan issue it must be the copier at fault. Tell you what Dick, I will check the copier and fix your print/scan issue, however, if I have to do anything on your computer or network, it is billable, how does that sound? Not acceptable after all they have a maintenance plan. I arrive, look at machine log. Nothing wrong with copier Dick, do you want to print/scan? I would like to adjust your computer Dick, do you want to roll the dice? If I can get you to print/scan you will be charged, if not, no charge. GUESS WHAT???

    That chicken Sh!t, said guess I will have IT check into it further. BTW Dick is not the real name, just the nickname I gave him.
    Did you make him aware that you have formally "deemed him a dick"? Free of charge! How can he complain about that?

  5. #695
    Field Supervisor 500+ Posts tsbservice's Avatar
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    Quote Originally Posted by tonerhead View Post
    My favorite of recent is everyone in office can print/scan except Dick. So Dick calls us to fix the copier because he can't print/scan. This is an IT issue Dick, have you spoken to your IT dept? He argues his computer is working better than ever with everything and being it is a print/scan issue it must be the copier at fault. Tell you what Dick, I will check the copier and fix your print/scan issue, however, if I have to do anything on your computer or network, it is billable, how does that sound? Not acceptable after all they have a maintenance plan. I arrive, look at machine log. Nothing wrong with copier Dick, do you want to print/scan? I would like to adjust your computer Dick, do you want to roll the dice? If I can get you to print/scan you will be charged, if not, no charge. GUESS WHAT???

    That chicken Sh!t, said guess I will have IT check into it further. BTW Dick is not the real name, just the nickname I gave him.
    This was good writing and hilarious.
    But if every person in medium sized or big office can call for service on their own that's not so good.
    Wait, is Dicky some sort of manager? This can explain such a stupidity
    A tree is known by its fruit, a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost, he who sows courtesy, reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.

  6. #696
    Service Manager 1,000+ Posts
    What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    Lagonda's Avatar
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    I ask IT twozzer for a postal address so I can send them out new serial number sticker for their printer and he gives me their email address.
    No wonder I can't wait to get out of this industry
    At least 50% of IT is a solution looking for a problem.

  7. #697
    Senior Tech 100+ Posts
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    Quote Originally Posted by tsbservice View Post
    This was good writing and hilarious.
    But if every person in medium sized or big office can call for service on their own that's not so good.
    Wait, is Dicky some sort of manager? This can explain such a stupidity

    Dick is higher level for local branch. Thinks he is "computer lit" thinks copier service techs are beneath his position status.
    Sex with my wife is like driving a Ferarri at 190 m.p.h.






    Yeah, I don't get to do that either

  8. #698
    Senior Tech 100+ Posts
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    One of my favorites a while back was I got urgent call from dispatch that this customer was on a time crunch and get over there asap.

    I talked to the lady in charge. Oh, thank God you are here we need to get this to our vendor asap. She proceeds to tell me that she printed it to the copier and was going to use the copier to email it to her vendor and it won't go through.

    Wait a minute, am I hearing you correctly? You printed it to the copier, so you can email it to the vendor, and it won't go through?

    Yes, that's right

    Why didn't you just attach it to an email from your pc?

    That's what I would normally do, but the internet is down, so I have to email it from the copier.
    Sex with my wife is like driving a Ferarri at 190 m.p.h.






    Yeah, I don't get to do that either

  9. #699
    Senior Tech 250+ Posts
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    Quote Originally Posted by tonerhead View Post
    Dick is higher level for local branch. Thinks he is "computer lit" thinks copier service techs are beneath his position status.
    Yeap ran into those types a few times. Even had one of the IT gurus insist hat DHCP needed to be left turned on because the smart software would find the new address of the copier each time just like the computers would when they were shut off and on. I did what he wanted and then had him and the office manager sign that "according to instructions DHCP was left engaged on the copier" I then explained we were not responsible for software but would be quite happy to set the address permanently to whatever but that there has to be a set address and not a variable one since the machine was designed to use only one ip address when accepting print jobs

  10. #700
    Senior Tech 250+ Posts
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    Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

    Quote Originally Posted by tonerhead View Post
    One of my favorites a while back was I got urgent call from dispatch that this customer was on a time crunch and get over there asap.

    I talked to the lady in charge. Oh, thank God you are here we need to get this to our vendor asap. She proceeds to tell me that she printed it to the copier and was going to use the copier to email it to her vendor and it won't go through.

    Wait a minute, am I hearing you correctly? You printed it to the copier, so you can email it to the vendor, and it won't go through?

    Yes, that's right

    Why didn't you just attach it to an email from your pc?

    That's what I would normally do, but the internet is down, so I have to email it from the copier.

    Actually had a multi function machine with all the bells and whistles plus a fax modem. And one rather young secretary thought she was scanning the documents to the preset emails addresses when she hit send to preset fax numbers. The faxes she was sending to were programmed in with the name of the person the faxes were being sent to. It was a construction company and they found it was easier to set up small fax machines in some of their job site trailers than trying to get a computer network set up miles from the nearest offices. Phone lines some problems but if there were electric lines nearby then there were probably phone lines too. She actually had never used a stand alone fax machine and thought the preset fax functions for the people she was sending them to was actually just an email. I mean she thought she scanned to email with the doc feeder and sent documents and pictures to other people that way with the copier so what was different with the fax button.

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