What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

[aab1]

I had a customer wanting to print white on black paper. After a long fight with him, telling him that in can not be done, and him telling me what a piece of sh!t this machine is, i showed him the 4 toners and asked him "How do you mix white with these 4 colors?"

He could add a black background to what he's printing if he's willing to pay the toner cost.

[aab1]

I once had a customer ask if we had a copier that used less paper.

There is, it's called double sided printing, uses 50% less paper.

[Voltage]

He could add a black background to what he's printing if he's willing to pay the toner cost.

Gave him that option but he had special paper. He wanted to print wedding cards

[Oztech]

I had a customer wanting to print white on black paper. After a long fight with him, telling him that in can not be done, and him telling me what a piece of sh!t this machine is, i showed him the 4 toners and asked him "How do you mix white with these 4 colors?"

Some of the old analogue Minolta's (4230/5400) had interchangeable dev units, so you could copy black and another colour, one of them was white! We only ever sold a couple of them but they did look impressive on dark paper

[Ikon Princess]

Working on a HP desktop color printer today (printer only) I am changing the toner at the end of the call, I have boxes and packaging all over the place. Somebody comes up behind me and fidgets, I turn around and look at her then she says it, can I just make a quick copy? I reply no it is a printer and does not have a scanner. She breathes deep and just stares for a bit then eventually leaves.

[zed255]

Working on a HP desktop color printer today (printer only) I am changing the toner at the end of the call, I have boxes and packaging all over the place. Somebody comes up behind me and fidgets, I turn around and look at her then she says it, can I just make a quick copy? I reply no it is a printer and does not have a scanner. She breathes deep and just stares for a bit then eventually leaves.

I'd have stepped aside and said 'Sure', then giggle to myself. Good times.

[Ikon Princess]

How did the Peanuts say it AAAUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[ignacio.cortez]

I would say, sure...... I'd like to see how you do it.

Working on a HP desktop color printer today (printer only) I am changing the toner at the end of the call, I have boxes and packaging all over the place. Somebody comes up behind me and fidgets, I turn around and look at her then she says it, can I just make a quick copy? I reply no it is a printer and does not have a scanner. She breathes deep and just stares for a bit then eventually leaves.

[ignacio.cortez]

I had a teacher at a High school come up to me, working on a PANASONIC copier, he asks.... So, how is our xerox? I responded, I dunno, this is a PANASONIC.

I had a couple of accounts when I worked in California say something similar, they looked at me walking into the place and say, the xerox guy is here, I stopped, turned around and asked Where?, they looked at me puzzled and said, you, I said, humm, I work on Kyocera machines, all the cases, they were teachers High School level or higher (college).
And to think our future is learning from them :-)

[kingarthur]

a number of years ago i had a really stroppy customer, who i used to take a lot of sh*t from. i was fixing her copier and she said i couldn't go until i had fixed it, even if it took all night, by this time i'd had enough, so i just said "fine...which side of the bed do you want!!!" after her initial shock..she just burst out laughing...never had any sh*t form her again....we became good friends...never did find out which side she preferred