Do you curse when working? (Warning: Could be baaaad words inside!)

[fixthecopier]

I have not only cussed the soilders, I have had to go back and wipe the message I wrote on the machine off, because the First Sargent was offended. There are some days when you can only take so much STUPID. Every quarter I have to get meters off my 300 contract machines in person. I did 132 today. Not bad for an old man. I found at least 9 machines with the change pc drum message. 4 of them had the message last quarter when I did meters. At least 4 people told me of broke machines that had been down for a while, to which I replied " it is their own Goddamn fault, all they have to do is call a work order in and get fixed same day." When I got back to the shop, none of them had called in. If I have a bad clutch in a paper tray, most of the time I have to take the tray out and carry it with me or they will keep putting paper in it. This will result in someone calling and complaining I showed up and took part of their machine. Some of these special customers will try to tell me how they call work orders in and nobody shows up to which I have called them "misinformed" and state I have been their only tech for 12 years, and they are full of shit! Have I mentioned over 40 instances of them filling their own toner bottles. I am lucky if it is just some other brand of toner and not a liquid. Or the machine saying please add toner and they pull out the drum unit and throw it away and then call and ask for toner. As I said before there is only so much STUPID I can take in one day.

[jcontractor]

I think that mrwho want with this post is examples with all the complete vocabulary, like "you mother fucker piece of shit, machine from the hell".
In especific situations and experiences.

[Mr Spock]

I have not said a bad word in front of a customer. I had a machine I could not fix and the specialist came out and he said a bad word... Maybe because he forgot that the lamp power supply is live even when the switch is off and the plug is still in the wall. He was reminded of this when his screwdriver slipped and hit the lead at the inverter pwb and gave him a nasty jolt. We had to borrow a ladder to get the screwdriver out of the ceiling tile.... He said a very very nasty word lucky no one heard it but me..

[mrwho]

I have not only cussed the soilders, I have had to go back and wipe the message I wrote on the machine off, because the First Sargent was offended. There are some days when you can only take so much STUPID. Every quarter I have to get meters off my 300 contract machines in person. I did 132 today. Not bad for an old man. I found at least 9 machines with the change pc drum message. 4 of them had the message last quarter when I did meters. At least 4 people told me of broke machines that had been down for a while, to which I replied " it is their own Goddamn fault, all they have to do is call a work order in and get fixed same day." When I got back to the shop, none of them had called in. If I have a bad clutch in a paper tray, most of the time I have to take the tray out and carry it with me or they will keep putting paper in it. This will result in someone calling and complaining I showed up and took part of their machine. Some of these special customers will try to tell me how they call work orders in and nobody shows up to which I have called them "misinformed" and state I have been their only tech for 12 years, and they are full of shit! Have I mentioned over 40 instances of them filling their own toner bottles. I am lucky if it is just some other brand of toner and not a liquid. Or the machine saying please add toner and they pull out the drum unit and throw it away and then call and ask for toner. As I said before there is only so much STUPID I can take in one day.

Wow... that makes... my worst customers look like genius in comparison. I'm sorry if I offend someone here who's done service for the military, it's not my intention, but is the army the last refuge for those dumb enough to get another job?

[fixthecopier]

The sad thing is that my customers are Special Forces. They are the cream of the crop. They will tell you that they are trained to kill and not to run office equipment. From the stories I have overheard they are very good at what they are trained to do.


One of my customers unit motto is "We do bad things to bad people, Cause some people just need killing"

My first call this morning will be with one of their combat companies. They called yesterday and said they ran something sticky like labels through the machine and now it jams. I just could not deal with it yesterday.


Did I fail to mention the one where I am downtown and I am having an awful day and one of them calls me and says "we only needed one overhead transparency so someone said we could use one of those plastic page protectors out of a binder, and well it melted in the machine" I actually told him I was going to go home and get my gun and shoot his stupid ass when I got there. Of course it was an idle threat, but when I got there he had picked all of the plastic out already. This guy was an instructor or teacher.

[Lawrence]

The sad thing is that my customers are Special Forces. They are the cream of the crop. They will tell you that they are trained to kill and not to run office equipment.

You could tell them instead of fucking up the copier they could be out killing all the camel humpers that need to be killed!

[prntrfxr]

I've said things under my breath when I've gotten hurt, but I've never gone that far on a customer. I heard of a tech somewhere who changed the control panel to read something like "Wait until it warms up, you idiot" (initializing), "Add paper, stupid" (add paper), or "F#$% you!" (when it jammed). Don't ask me how he did it, but I thought that was really funny. When the customer asked about it, they were told "all the new machines do that". The customer actually liked it. Go figure.

[DAG COPIERS & COMPUTERS]

Honestly speaking, the type of "BAD LANGUAGE" you people use there in that part of the world is totally unheard of in this corner of the globe where i live except may be among the city riff-rafts, lump ens or thugs. ( No offense intended). We are raised up from childhood with very strict moral values such that ,to hear a word like 'F**k you' in this part of the world uttered from your mouth, would make you liable to be EXCOMMUNICATED from the society!
The only best word u may use even if a machine u r working on chops off your fingers is JESUS!!!!!! or Oooh MY GOD, I have hurt myself!!! Any other word used other than these is assumed to be coming from the devil. In any case the customer would politely request you to leave her premises and not comeback again!

[TonerMunkeh]

You could tell them instead of fucking up the copier they could be out killing all the camel humpers that need to be killed!

Amen brother, amen.

I unfortunately worked for a construction firm for approximately 7 years and every other word that came out of my fellow employees' mouth was "fuck". I can swear with the best of them. The only down side is I have to bottle up what I think and say during the week to put up a nice front for the customer. Unfortunately, I am a total bastard on a Saturday as all the shit I've buried through the week comes out. The missus calls it "grumpy Saturday".

With regard to swearing in front of customers, the worst I've said is "jesus christ" when I got belted by a Stella's power supply while plugging the fuser back in. I discretely swear under my breath when a machine is severly pissing me off, but my best way of calming down if copiers are giving me shit is to go and loiter outside and have a cigarette, take 5 minutes, kick the nearest cat then put my smiley face back on!

[fixthecopier]

You could tell them instead of fucking up the copier they could be out killing all the camel humpers that need to be killed!

They have all been there and done their time. They go often and look forward to it. In all the years I have been there, never seen fear. One thing that is different about where I work is that when I am going to units that see combat, they have markers or some kind of memorial for each person who did not come back. Sometimes there are family members grieving as you walk by. The worst is when I look at a plaque on the wall and see somebody I remember dealing with. Some kid I showed how to put toner in, or a Sergent that would talk to me while I worked on his machine. It helps me keep things in perspective. Every day I get up and my family is O.K. , is going to be a great day.