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Thread: One Liners

  1. #11
    How'd ya manage that? 1,000+ Posts
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    "Outside of a dog a book is man's best friend, inside of a dog it's too dark to read."

    Groucho Marx

  2. #12
    just one copy?? 500+ Posts
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    jonezy999's Avatar
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    Siting it the sun having a beer with my dad on a winters arvo
    ME: "It's nice in the sun"
    DAD: "It's even better in the daughter"

    Dad saw a hot girl walking down the street
    "I'd rather be hanging out of that than a 10 story building."
    I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. ~Thomas Edison

  3. #13
    Geek Extraordinaire 2,500+ Posts KenB's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jonezy999 View Post
    Siting it the sun having a beer with my dad on a winters arvo
    ME: "It's nice in the sun"
    DAD: "It's even better in the daughter"

    Dad saw a hot girl walking down the street
    "I'd rather be hanging out of that than a 10 story building."
    Sounds like your Dad is quite the interesting guy.
    “I think you should treat good friends like a fine wine. That’s why I keep mine locked up in the basement.” - Tim Hawkins

  4. #14
    just one copy?? 500+ Posts
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    Quote Originally Posted by KenB View Post
    Sounds like your Dad is quite the interesting guy.
    Yeh, to say the least. Also pretty handy with a screw driver. Not a bad boss either.
    I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. ~Thomas Edison

  5. #15
    Senior Tech 2,500+ Posts
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    mikadonovan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jules Winfield View Post
    I saw a little old lady getting mugged by three guys and had to get involved. She was a tough old broad, but in the end we got her purse...
    Damn funny!
    NEVER ASSUME ANYTHING

  6. #16
    Service Manager 1,000+ Posts
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    Lagonda's Avatar
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    One of the cadet salesmen was getting excited about making his first sale.

    One of the techs asked him if his mother really wanted to buy a printer.
    At least 50% of IT is a solution looking for a problem.

  7. #17
    just one copy?? 500+ Posts
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    jonezy999's Avatar
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    Here's two of the same,

    All over the place like a mad woman's shit

    or

    Shit everywhere like ya Grandma's undies.
    I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. ~Thomas Edison

  8. #18
    ALIEN OVERLORD 2,500+ Posts fixthecopier's Avatar
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    The cream will rise to the top, but remember some turds float also.
    The greatest enemy of knowledge isn't ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge. Stephen Hawking

  9. #19
    Senior Tech 100+ Posts 11x17's Avatar
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    The early bird may get the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese!

  10. #20
    Field Supervisor 500+ Posts HenryT2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lagonda View Post
    One of the cadet salesmen was getting excited about making his first sale.

    One of the techs asked him if his mother really wanted to buy a printer.

    I really like that one..........reminds me of some sales people I have known . On a really good month, they could manage to sell ONE unit ( to a friend or relative ) and the boss just loved them .

    11 X 17 That is worth contemplating ,
    Remember : SOME MISTAKES ARE TOO MUCH FUN TO ONLY MAKE ONCE !
    "The Serenity Prayer" . . .
    God grant me the serenity to accept stupid people , the courage to not waste my time and energy on them , and the wisdom to know that I cannot fix STUPID .

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