Thread: Joke of the Day

  1. #3561
    Senior member of CRS 2,500+ Posts
    Joke of the Day

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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by NeoMatrix View Post
    ....No.

    They can suffer blue ball which causes the tackle to drag in the dirty an burs, sometimes causing infection.
    If they get infected they call in the veterinarian to ease the problem and clear up the infection.....
    I'm not sure I want to see this, but my curiosity asks for a utube or link.

    "You can't trust your eyes, if your mind is out of focus" --

  2. #3562
    ALIEN OVERLORD 2,500+ Posts fixthecopier's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    There was a little boy who was obsessed with tractors...

    ...he grew up around tractors, his mother and father were both farmers, and the family lived on a farm. Every day he would get driven to school on a tractor, and his dad would always pick him up on a tractor. Whenever christmas came around, he would always wish for tractor toys, miniatures, and pretty much anything that was related to tractors, and during birthdays he would get tractor shaped cakes. His life was full of tractors, and he couldn't get enough of them.
    When the boy was around the age of 15 he started getting really interested in girls. There was this cute girl at school that he liked, but he didn't have the courage to ask her out. He went home to his dad and told him he needed to stop being so obsessed with tractors, because no girl would ever like him if all he cared about was tractors. The dad decided to take the boy to therapy. It took a long time with multiple visits, but eventually the boy managed to get rid of his obsession with tractors. The boy decided that he wanted to ask the cute girl from school out on a date. He built up all the courage he could, and asked her out. She said yes! The boy was very happy, and later the same day he had already reserved a table at a restaurant for them to eat at.
    The big day was here. The boy and girl were sitting at their table at a nice restaurant, waiting for their food. The boy was really happy, but the girl seemed a bit upset.
    "What's wrong?" the boy asked.
    "Nothing much, I love this place but it's a bit smoky in here" she replied
    The boy stood up, emptied his lungs, and cleared the room of smoke in one breath.
    The girl was amazed. "Wow, how did you do that?", she asked.
    The boy replied:
    "I am an extractor fan"

    The greatest enemy of knowledge isn't ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge. Stephen Hawking

  3. #3563
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    Joke of the Day

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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by fixthecopier View Post
    There was a little boy who was obsessed with tractors..."I am an extractor fan"

    I can't wait for Aneurysm any longer so I made my own..........





    At least 50% of IT is a solution looking for a problem.

  4. #3564
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by Lagonda View Post
    I can't wait for Aneurysm any longer so I made my own..........



    I can't see the icon, but I imagine it is a "groan" button.

    "You can't trust your eyes, if your mind is out of focus" --

  5. #3565
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    At least 50% of IT is a solution looking for a problem.

  6. #3566
    Senior Tech. 2,500+ Posts NeoMatrix's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by Lagonda View Post
    ... Can I borrow,steal, pinch, nic, thieve, that groan button... ?


    It's so going to get some use....

    What if we could count the stars... , what number would you stop at...?"
    [Exchange manual acquisitions, PM's CTN members only. ]
    [] |N | | o | M | Δ | t | π | | x | []

  7. #3567
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by NeoMatrix View Post
    ... Can I borrow,steal, pinch, nic, thieve, that groan button... ?


    It's so going to get some use....
    It's all yours, I nicked it of the net.

    At least 50% of IT is a solution looking for a problem.

  8. #3568
    ALIEN OVERLORD 2,500+ Posts fixthecopier's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned: couldn't concentrate.

    The greatest enemy of knowledge isn't ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge. Stephen Hawking

  9. #3569
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Wife's Diary:
    Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a nice restaurant for dinner. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment on it. Conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn't say much. I asked him what was wrong; He said, "nothing." I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said he wasn't upset, that it had nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it.
    On the way home, I told him that I loved him. He smiled slightly, and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior. I don't know why he didn't say, 'I love you, too.'
    When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there quietly, and watched TV. He continued to seem distant and absent.
    Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes later, he came to bed. But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts were somewhere else. He fell asleep; I cried. I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else.
    My life is a disaster.
    Husband's Diary, same day:
    A two-foot putt.. Who the hell misses a two-foot putt?

    The greatest enemy of knowledge isn't ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge. Stephen Hawking

  10. #3570
    Retired 5,000+ Posts slimslob's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by Lagonda View Post
    This us just what I need for Facebook.


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