Thread: Joke of the Day

  1. #3681
    Senior Tech 100+ Posts DRichard's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by Debs1964 View Post
    But remember, there's some of us that would have no interest in bra size calculations ;-)
    Liar...


  2. #3682
    Senior Tech. 2,500+ Posts NeoMatrix's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by DRichard View Post
    Liar...

    Ah... Debs1964 is female........

    What if we could count the stars... , what number would you stop at...?"
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  3. #3683
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    Re: Joke of the Day




  4. #3684
    Service Manager 1,000+ Posts
    Joke of the Day

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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by NeoMatrix View Post
    Ah... Debs1964 is female........
    Merry Christmas Debs, where ever you are,we miss you.

    At least 50% of IT is a solution looking for a problem.

  5. #3685
    Retired 5,000+ Posts slimslob's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    When Wilber Took Up Golf

    Author
    UnknownCompiled By:
    JD Hoeye



    My wife said to me, "Wilbur it's time you learned to play golf. That's the game where you chase a ball all over the country when you are to old to chose women."
    So I went to see Jones and asked him if he would teach me to play.
    He said, "You sure got balls, don't you?"
    I said, "Sure, but sometimes on a cold morning they are hard to find."
    "Bring them to the clubhouse tomorrow," he said, "and we will tee off."
    "What's tee off?" That's what I asked him, and he said, "It's a golf term and we have to tee off in front of the clubhouse."
    "Not for me," I said, "you can tee off if you want to but I'll tee off behind the barn or somewhere."
    "No, no," he said, "A tee is a thing about the size of your little finger."
    "Yea, I've got one of those."
    "Well," he said, "you stick it in the ground and put your ball on top of it."
    I asked, "Do you play golf sitting down?? I always thought you stood up and walked around."
    "You do," he said, "your standing up when you put you ball on the tee."
    "Well folks," I thought, "that was stretching things a bit too far, and I said so!"
    He said, "You've got a bag haven't you?"
    "Sure." I said.
    He said, "You've got balls in it haven't you?"
    "Of course." I said.
    "Well," he asked, "can't you open the bag and take one out?"
    I said, "I suppose I could, but I'll be damned if I was going to!"
    He asked, "Don't you have a zipper on your bag?
    I told him, "No. I'm old fashioned."
    Then he asked me if I knew how to hold my club!
    ....Well now, after fifty years I should have some idea and I told him so!
    He said that you take your club in both hands, (folks, I knew right then he didn't know what he was talking about), then he said "you swing it over your shoulders..."
    "No!! No!! That's not me, that's my brother your thinking of."
    He asked, "Well how do you hold your club?"
    Before I thought, I said, "In my two fingers."
    He said, that that wasn't right and got behind me and put both arms around me and told me to bend over and he would show me how...
    Well he didn't catch me there, because I didn't spend four years in the Navy for nothing!!
    So he said I could just imagine!! Then went on,"When your on the green..."
    What's a green, I asked?
    That's where the hole is, he said.
    Are you sure you're not color blind? I asked.
    No.. then you take your putter..
    What's your putter, I asked?
    That's the smallest club made, he said.
    That's what I've got, a putter!!
    And with it, he said, you put your ball in the hole.
    I corrected, you mean the putter?
    He said, "NO. The ball. The hole isn't big enough for the ball and the putter too..."
    Well now folks, I've seen holes big enough for a horse and wagon!!!!
    Then he said you go on to the next seventeen holes after you've made the first hole.
    He wasn't thinking of me, after two holes, I'm shot to hell!!!!
    "You mean you can't make eighteen holes in a day??" He asked.
    "Hell no, it takes me eighteen days to make one hole!!! Besides how do I know when I'm in the eighteenth hole??" I asked him.
    And he said, "The flag will go up......"
    THAT WOULD BE JUST MY LUCK..........


  6. #3686
    Junior Member oyedokunmj's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    How to refix jam00 in Kyocera 1620

    Sent from my Infinix X510 using Tapatalk


  7. #3687
    Master Of The Obvious 10,000+ Posts
    Joke of the Day

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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by oyedokunmj View Post
    How to refix jam00 in Kyocera 1620

    Sent from my Infinix X510 using Tapatalk
    As a joke of the day, ... I just don't see the humor.

    If you'd like to some help on your Kyocera, why don't you start a new thread in the Kyocera Forum? =^..^=

    If you'd like a serious answer to your request:
    1) demonstrate that you've read the manual
    2) demonstrate that you made some attempt to fix it.
    3) if you're going to ask about jams include the jam code.
    4) if you're going to ask about an error code include the error code.


    blackcat: Master Of The Obvious =^..^=

  8. #3688
    Confused & Bewildered 250+ Posts sdrawkcab's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by blackcat4866 View Post
    As a joke of the day, ... I just don't see the humor.

    If you'd like to some help on your Kyocera, why don't you start a new thread in the Kyocera Forum? =^..^=


    Two Kyocera techs walk into a bar.....

    Some days, it's just not worth chewing through the restraints

  9. #3689
    Senior Tech. 2,500+ Posts NeoMatrix's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by sdrawkcab View Post
    Two Kyocera techs walk into a bar.....
    We're their names Michael Fitzpatrick and Patrick FitzMichael ?

    What if we could count the stars... , what number would you stop at...?"
    [Exchange manual acquisitions, PM's CTN members only. ]
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  10. #3690
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by NeoMatrix View Post
    We're their names Michael Fitzpatrick and Patrick FitzMichael ?
    I was told they were Ben Doon and Phillip McCavity!

    At least 50% of IT is a solution looking for a problem.

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