Thread: Joke of the Day

  1. #2311
    Field Supervisor 500+ Posts gwaddle's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by Akitu View Post
    I'll be hitting the road for the next few weeks, so my jokes will cease until I get back. Try not to miss the compendium too much!
    I suspect the whole site will just shut down until you return.
    I know I should be ashamed of myself. Strangely though, I am not.

  2. #2312
    Legendary Frost Spec Tech 2,500+ Posts
    Joke of the Day

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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by gwaddle View Post
    I suspect the whole site will just shut down until you return.
    Perhaps the joke thread...
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  3. #2313
    Service Manager Mr.Claire's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Where's the best place to hide a body?

    Page two of Google.

  4. #2314
    Not a service manager 2,500+ Posts Iowatech's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr.Claire View Post
    Yo mamma so fat I took a picture of her last Christmas and its still printing.
    Oh yeah, take this:
    Yo momma so fat, her little black dress looks like outer space.

  5. #2315
    Senior Tech. 2,500+ Posts NeoMatrix's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr.Claire View Post
    Where's the best place to hide a body?

    Page two of Google.
    hmmmmm, dis be an IT. joke ?

    I had to google it.... you got me. I'm as lost as a boy scout in a female only nudist colony.
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    Service Manager 1,000+ Posts Debs1964's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by Shadow1 View Post
    Pro Tip: Don't google for NSFW either. (Not Safe For Work)
    Too late, I already did
    There are 10 types of people in this world, those who understand binary maths and those who don't

  7. #2317
    Retired 10,000+ Posts
    Joke of the Day

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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by NeoMatrix View Post
    hmmmmm, dis be an IT. joke ?

    I had to google it.... you got me. I'm as lost as a boy scout in a female only nudist colony.
    I think he is making the assumption that when people Google something, they only look at the first page of results.

  8. #2318
    Geek Extraordinaire 2,500+ Posts KenB's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by slimslob View Post
    I think he is making the assumption that when people Google something, they only look at the first page of results.
    Definitely some truth to that.

    Quite often, by the time you get to the second page, it's gone waaaaay off topic.
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  9. #2319
    ALIEN OVERLORD 2,500+ Posts fixthecopier's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    A man is having a conversation with his new neighbor. The neighbor comments on how beautiful the man's wife is.

    "Thank you. My wife will be flattered"
    "Your wife is one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen"
    Again the man thanks him
    "Your wife has the best looking tits"
    "Where are you going with this?" ask the man
    "You know , I would give $100 just to suck on one of her tits"
    Instead of being offended, the man thought about how he could really use $100
    He goes inside and tells his wife. She thinks about how they really need the money.
    "Well , I guess it wouldn't be all that bad. I mean it would only take a few minutes and we need the money."
    The woman takes her top off and lays down on the couch. The man goes outside and waves for his neighbor to come over.
    "WOW, those are beautiful" he says
    The neighbor kneels down and begins kissing the breast and rubbing his face on them, and licking them, but never sucks on them. This goes on for about 15 minutes and finally the husband says,"Well, aren't you going to suck on them?" to which the neighbor replies, "I can't. I don't have $100"
    The greatest enemy of knowledge isn't ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge. Stephen Hawking

  10. #2320
    Retired 10,000+ Posts
    Joke of the Day

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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by fixthecopier View Post
    A man is having a conversation with his new neighbor. The neighbor comments on how beautiful the man's wife is.

    "Thank you. My wife will be flattered"
    "Your wife is one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen"
    Again the man thanks him
    "Your wife has the best looking tits"
    "Where are you going with this?" ask the man
    "You know , I would give $100 just to suck on one of her tits"
    Instead of being offended, the man thought about how he could really use $100
    He goes inside and tells his wife. She thinks about how they really need the money.
    "Well , I guess it wouldn't be all that bad. I mean it would only take a few minutes and we need the money."
    The woman takes her top off and lays down on the couch. The man goes outside and waves for his neighbor to come over.
    "WOW, those are beautiful" he says
    The neighbor kneels down and begins kissing the breast and rubbing his face on them, and licking them, but never sucks on them. This goes on for about 15 minutes and finally the husband says,"Well, aren't you going to suck on them?" to which the neighbor replies, "I can't. I don't have $100"
    Moral of the story: Get the money up front!

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