Joke of the Day

[slimslob]

Only "one match" ? Aren't you worried it might blow out from wind..?

If everyone donates one I'm sure that there will be plenty.

[Iowatech]

An internet flame with the power of the Apollo moon rocket!
Be sure to read the whole thing so you know why something like this exists.

[Lagonda]

Bert always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots. He's an elderly man and figures he's not getting any younger. So seeing some on sale one day, he buys them, wears them home, walking proudly.

He walks into the house an says to his wife: "Notice anything different about me?"

Margaret looks him over, "Nope."

Frustrated Bert storms off into the bathroom, undresses and walks back into the room completely naked except for the boots.

Again, he asks, a little louder this time, "Notice anything different NOW?:

Margaret looks up and says, "Bert, what's different? It's hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday and it'll be hanging down tomorrow."

Furious, Bert yells, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT IS HANGING DOWN, MARGARET?"

"Nope", she replies.

"IT'S HANGING DOWN BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!!"

To which Margaret replies... "Shoulda bought a hat, Bert. Shoulda bought a hat."


Mrs Lagonda just sent me that, I wonder if she's hinting at anything?

[ZOOTECH]

Bert always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots. He's an elderly man and figures he's not getting any younger. So seeing some on sale one day, he buys them, wears them home, walking proudly.

He walks into the house an says to his wife: "Notice anything different about me?"

Margaret looks him over, "Nope."

Frustrated Bert storms off into the bathroom, undresses and walks back into the room completely naked except for the boots.

Again, he asks, a little louder this time, "Notice anything different NOW?:

Margaret looks up and says, "Bert, what's different? It's hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday and it'll be hanging down tomorrow."

Furious, Bert yells, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT IS HANGING DOWN, MARGARET?"

"Nope", she replies.

"IT'S HANGING DOWN BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!!"

To which Margaret replies... "Shoulda bought a hat, Bert. Shoulda bought a hat."


Mrs Lagonda just sent me that, I wonder if she's hinting at anything?

Only you can tell us that, or the Mrs.

[Lagonda]

Only you can tell us that, or the Mrs.

And I thought all those emails trying to sell me viagara was just random spam......................

[NeoMatrix]

And I thought all those emails trying to sell me viagara was just random spam......................

Okay, <woooshh> I confess, it took a second read but I got the cowboy boots joke...
I was about to ask the missus if she got it.....

[NeoMatrix]

An internet flame with the power of the Apollo moon rocket!
Be sure to read the whole thing so you know why something like this exists.

Sh!zzt.... I actually read the whole thing... lucky you said too... It started to get personal...

[slimslob]

[Akitu]

What do Green Eggs and Ham and Fifty Shades of Grey have in common?
They both encourage people who can barely read to try new things.

[Akitu]

My black friend asked me if there was a coloured printer in the library. I said wtf man, it's 2015 and you can use whatever printer you want.