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Thread: Joke of the Day

  1. #3841
    Field Supervisor 500+ Posts bob marley's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Live for yourself and you will live in vain. Live for others, and you will live again

  2. #3842
    Service Manager 1,000+ Posts Phil B.'s Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by bob marley View Post

    OH! So that's how they came up with Windows 10! now I understand!


  3. #3843
    ALIEN OVERLORD 2,500+ Posts fixthecopier's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    I tried to remarry my ex wife. It fell through when she relized I was doing it to get my hands on my money.

    Democracy is still the worst form of government, except for all the rest of them.

  4. #3844
    ALIEN OVERLORD 2,500+ Posts fixthecopier's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    My wife packed my bags and kicked me out of the house.
    As I walked out the front door, she screamed,
    "I wish you a slow and painful death, you bastard!"
    "Oh," I replied, "so now you want me to stay!"

    Democracy is still the worst form of government, except for all the rest of them.

  5. #3845
    Technician Metrofuser's Avatar
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    so, a midget psychic escaped from prison



    ..a small medium at large



  6. #3846
    Service Manager 1,000+ Posts
    Joke of the Day

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    Re: so, a midget psychic escaped from prison

    Quote Originally Posted by Metrofuser View Post


    ..a small medium at large
    That's a Two Ronnies joke

    download.jpg

    Two of the funnies men on TV

    At least 50% of IT is a solution looking for a problem.

  7. #3847
    Retired 5,000+ Posts slimslob's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day




  8. #3848
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    I wonder if my dog thinks the pizza delivery guy is my owner?


  9. #3849
    Retired 5,000+ Posts slimslob's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day




  10. #3850
    Retired 5,000+ Posts slimslob's Avatar
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    There is nothing worse than a Doctor's Receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients.
    I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy handled it.
    A 85-year-old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the desk.
    The Receptionist said, 'Yes sir, what are you seeing the Doctor for today?'
    'There's something wrong with my dick', he replied.
    The receptionist became irritated and said, 'You shouldn't come into a crowded waiting room and say things like that. '
    'Why not, you asked me what was wrong and I told you,' he said.
    The Receptionist replied; 'Now you've caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear or something and discussed the problem further with the Doctor in private.'
    The man replied, 'You shouldn't ask people questions in a roomful of strangers, if the answer could embarrass anyone. The man walked out, waited several minutes, and then re-entered.
    The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, 'Yes??'
    'There's something wrong with my ear,' he stated.
    The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice.. 'And what is wrong with your ear, Sir?'
    'I can't piss out of it,' he replied.
    The waiting room erupted in laughter...
    Mess with seniors, and you're going to lose


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