"I think it's the rollers"

**PeterG** · 08-09-2012

Originally Posted by CopierTechofOmens

"Did you ever see office space?" "No, did you ever see 'Falling down'?"

I once went into a Macca's and asked for a Big Mac & a Fillet o fish mid morning. The girl informed me that I couldn't have them because they were still on the Breakfast menu. I said "Have you ever seen Falling Down". She said, "No". The moment was lost. True Story. I so felt for Michael Douglas.

**kingarthur** · 08-09-2012

Originally Posted by PeterG

I once went into a Macca's and asked for a Big Mac & a Fillet o fish mid morning. The girl informed me that I couldn't have them because they were still on the Breakfast menu. I said "Have you ever seen Falling Down". She said, "No". The moment was lost. True Story. I so felt for Michael Douglas.

Talking of Big Macs, i went to one, a long time ago, the offer was Big Mac & fries & a coke, i ordered one & said i didn't want the coke,i was told i had to have the coke, i asked why, was told because thats what the offer was, if i didn't have the coke, i'd have to pay full price for Big Mac & fries,so i took it all & tipped the coke away.....

Another time i went to the supermarket & it was a "saturday kid", i asked for half a pound of cheese....he said...."we only have one pound blocks"......

where do they get these people from....

**RRodgers** · 08-10-2012

Originally Posted by aodtech

This never gets old. You are either talking to the customer finding out more details as to what the problem is or you have started working on the machine and some random customer reinterates what you already know. It doesn't matter what the problem is. Squeaking noise, grinding noise, black lines, black spots, jamming... it's always "the rollers" according to the customer. And then you try your hardest to suppress any retaliation that is going through your head. Bitchslap or a simple "Then you fix it asshole!" I always just humor the customer and say "I'll take a look" and mumble "dumbass" when they are out of earshot. What are some things that the customer says to you that immediately makes your blood boil?Another one is when they tell me that I am the umpteenth tech to come out and that it's always broken. And...? "Bring us a new one"

One that I've come up with, (but haven't and can't use is) Tuesday.... (customer says what?) I say Tuesdays.... (what do you mean by Tuesday?) Tuesday... is that they day you were at copier repair school cuz I was out sick that day.

**Shadow1** · 08-10-2012

lol - I've talked nonsense to a customer to answer a stupid question before: Customer says "" I say, "Only under a full moon." "What?" "With grass on the roof" "???" "When reindeer sit on clouds?" "you're nuts" I nod and say, "Size 12." They usually walk wide circles around me after that, possibly clutching a big can of pepper spray.

**blackcat4866** · 08-10-2012

Originally Posted by Shadow1

lol - I've talked nonsense to a customer to answer a stupid question before: Customer says "" I say, "Only under a full moon." "What?" "With grass on the roof" "???" "When reindeer sit on clouds?" "you're nuts" I nod and say, "Size 12." They usually walk wide circles around me after that, possibly clutching a big can of pepper spray.

It works for me. =^..^=

**aodtech** · 08-11-2012

I forgot about the whole "The copies are light. I replaced the toner and they are still light". And apparently "replacing the toner" means taking it out and dumping half of the contents into Cassette 1. Since toner is supplied under contract, I always ask for the "empty" one and usually put it back in. Almost every time the transfer bushings break on a Kyocera Falcon 2, this is how it starts. And speaking of empty toners, what about the call decription "Making noises/not copying" and you find out that the toner cartridge is more hollow than the skull of the idiot who placed the service call. My favorite bit of sarcarm is when a customer complains that the document feeder is pulling in too many pages. "How many are you expecting it to pull in?" Oh, and I just had a call a few days ago for lines and the cutomer pulled the same "We think the rollers need to be replaced" line. I just said OK with the straightest face I could hold, bent down and was CTFU silently hoping nobody would see me.

**fixthecopier** · 08-11-2012

I walked into a call for jamming. Guy standing by the copier says to me "I think it needs a registration clutch". I replied "Are you a certified Konica Minolta tech?" He replied "I was before I joined the Army". I said "Wait here while I go get a clutch"