Things you would love to say to a customer

[Lagonda]

8 things you would love to say to a customer but daren’t!
(‘cos you have a very large mortgage to pay)


Don’t give me a hard time, I didn’t sell it too you.

You’re only a real estate agent, your not as important as you think you are.

You payed how much? Usually they retail for $5000 less than that.

If the old copier worked better than this one, why did you let the salesman talk you into buying a new one?

Don’t you understand the concept of a lease? Even if you send it back to us you still have to pay the leasing company every month.

The Managing Directors home phone number is…………..

Did you pass the I.Q. test that’s a pre-condition to purchasing a photocopier?

If you break your copier again I’m taking it away and leaving you with some carbon paper.

[SCREWTAPE]

1.You stupid mother(beep, beep).

2.Who cares!

3.Yea, yea, looks like its your problem.

4.No you can't change your machine.

5.Go ahead call the service manager; Your looking at him!

[peterepeat]

Yes, I am the toner delivery guy....
and you're service technician.....
and the IT expert........
and of course I'll sweep your parking lot....

BUT I WON'T HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN WHILE YOU DO THAT DUPLEX/SHRINK&CENTER/3-HOLE-PUNCH/SADDLESTITCH COPY JOB!!!!!!!

[mjarbar]

BUT I WON'T HOLD YOUR HAND AGAIN WHILE YOU DO THAT DUPLEX/SHRINK&CENTER/3-HOLE-PUNCH/SADDLESTITCH COPY JOB!!!!!!!

Are we talking personal nightmare here or just a set of functions at random?

Mine at the moment is "I don't care you are the managing director, I am not shoving a broom up my a**e just because you think I have nothing better to do..."

[prntrfxr]

Just because I chose a profession that requires me to carry a tool case and a vaccuum, doesn't mean I'm not intelligent or have been to college, Mr ___________________(Insert one of the following: Lawyer/Accountant/Doctor).

Snooty, arrogant people who can't even figure out how to load a paper tray, should not have the right to look down their nose at me.

[jimbo1]

I bet I could do your job easier than you could do mine.

[robscopyr]

1. You're a non-profit organization? Guess what...We're not.
2. I'm sure you didn't, copiers break themselves all the time.
3.You're right, they built it that way so you could remove staples and dump them down the side of the copier, the bent staple eater must have malfunctioned.
4. Yeah... who would have known that this electronic piece of equipment could not handle a soda spilled down the back of it! What a piece of junk!
5. Why don't you try shoving that paper up your a**.

[RRodgers]

Quit teasing me and take those out and show me already!!!

[10871087]

How about: Hey lady, go fuck yourself, I'm just trying to help.

(sorry if I offended but it what I wanted to say)

[TheOwl]

1. I don't care how urgent your print job is, my lunch is more important than you and your copier.

2. I can fix the copier, but I can't fix stupid.

3. If you didn't use the copier it wouldn't break down, so you must be the problem.

4. I'm not a furniture removalist. If you want to put the copier there, then do it yourself.

5. Sit down, shut the F@#K up and let me do my job.

6. Your friend doesn't know S#!T about copiers, so let me tell you what is wrong with it.

7. The service manager doesn't care about you either.

Just some of the things I want to say and at some stage will probably end up saying to someone. lol