Out of this world questions of the costumers.

[Metalvoc]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

We had a construction company that liked to "fix" their own copiers. They had a fax torn apart completely, and could not get it back together. My boss (at the time) went out to look at it, and they handed him a box of parts. He told them "I don't build houses. You don't fix copiers." I don't think they tried to take anything apart again.

[blackcat4866]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

I was at a non-profit once, working on an ancient Sharp SF-xxxx. The secretary was telling me that when she places originals in the document feeder tray, the document feeder inserts blank pages into the original set. I asked her if maybe the blanks were blank copies as a result of a copy being made during an original jam. No, she insisted that there were more originals after scanning.

I commented that that must be nice. All you would have to do is scan the originals several times then remove all the extra blank, newly created paper. Theoretically you would never have to buy paper again. And where do you suppose this extra paper is coming from? She didn't know, but she didn't like it.

Her supervisor was listening in, and asked the young lady to go do some task. Then she rolled her eyes and told me that there wasn't anything for me to fix. I could stop trying to explain.

I thanked her sincerely, and moved on.

[mrwho]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

Left a customer an hour ago who's been told her small A4 machine would make copies of books. Somehow she understood the machine would flip the pages without human intervention.

[Akitu]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

Left a customer an hour ago who's been told her small A4 machine would make copies of books. Somehow she understood the machine would flip the pages without human intervention.

Wow! Just where do I get one of those?

[Ollie1981]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

My favorites:

1. You first arrive, before you look at machine...What is wrong with it and how long will it take?

2. You have the machine tore apart and some idiot asks.....Can I make a copy?

Hehe, I've had customer's ask me what the problem is and how long it'll take when I've rang to give them an eta before leaving my last call...

As for number two, you've got to love that. There's also the variation where you've got the machine in pieces, front door is open and parts are strewn about. Then someone comes in, doesn't say a word, and checks the output tray for a print job that they have just sent.

A while ago now and only once have I had a customer actually plug in and power on an Aficio 2075 that I was working in the back of, I was just finishing up refitting everything in the back (waste toner transport, relay motor, drum flywheel, bypass clutch etc) after fitting new registration mylars (a fairly involved job on one of these, those who work on these know what I'm talking about) and had the front door open, the drum and development units out on a table next to the machine, and half of the machine covers off. The first I knew was the click from the PSU.... I jumped up like I'd been stung and pulled the power cord out of the wall.

Then he tried to chew me out because... and I quote "I don't need to use it's photocopier, I just need to use it to print.... why does the whole machine have to be out of order for a fault with just one of it's parts"

I was so annoyed I nearly fed him his own teeth, I went outside and had a smoke (when I did smoke), calmed down and settled for speaking with the senior manager on site and explaining to her the details of health and safety law concerning their duty of care in law to contractors, specifically the part where if some assclown plugs in a machine that I am in the middle of repairing whilst I'm repairing it and it causes me an injury, then I get a no-win no-fee personal injury solicitor and sue them.

I can't think of any parallel, it's like turning up to the garage with your car mid-way through having it's transmission clutch plate (or some similar major engine-out overhaul), taking the keys out of the mechanic's office and climbing up on the ramp and trying to start it while he's down in the inspection pit.

Some people really do have shit for brains, and a bad attitude to go with it.

[kingpd@businessprints.net]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

There were book copiers but they didn't turn the pages. They were designed so that you didn't ruin the spines and could can the page flat.

Oddly enough, some years ago, some company made a book copier that actually turned the pages.

Obviously, it was a massive flop, but it did exist.

[prntrfxr]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

A while ago now and only once have I had a customer actually plug in and power on an Aficio 2075 that I was working in the back of, I was just finishing up refitting everything in the back (waste toner transport, relay motor, drum flywheel, bypass clutch etc) after fitting new registration mylars (a fairly involved job on one of these, those who work on these know what I'm talking about) and had the front door open, the drum and development units out on a table next to the machine, and half of the machine covers off. The first I knew was the click from the PSU.... I jumped up like I'd been stung and pulled the power cord out of the wall.

Then he tried to chew me out because... and I quote "I don't need to use it's photocopier, I just need to use it to print.... why does the whole machine have to be out of order for a fault with just one of it's parts"

I was so annoyed I nearly fed him his own teeth, I went outside and had a smoke (when I did smoke), calmed down and settled for speaking with the senior manager on site and explaining to her the details of health and safety law concerning their duty of care in law to contractors, specifically the part where if some assclown plugs in a machine that I am in the middle of repairing whilst I'm repairing it and it causes me an injury, then I get a no-win no-fee personal injury solicitor and sue them.

I can't think of any parallel, it's like turning up to the garage with your car mid-way through having it's transmission clutch plate (or some similar major engine-out overhaul), taking the keys out of the mechanic's office and climbing up on the ramp and trying to start it while he's down in the inspection pit.

Some people really do have shit for brains, and a bad attitude to go with it.

I had a similar thing happen to me. I was halfway in the machine trying to reach the HVPS contacts on the other side of the interior, when some lady came in, plugged it in, and powered it up. I jumped out nearly cracking my skull open and said something like, "What are you trying to do, kill me or something?" "I just wanted to make a copy, God!" was her reply. In her defense, I did say a couple of insulting things after that about her intelligence level, but I did not use bad language. When I got back to the office, my boss told me she called and made a complaint. That I said some obscene things. I explained what happened, but some people should not be allowed to touch anything connected to electricity.

[Akitu]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

I had a similar thing happen to me. I was halfway in the machine trying to reach the HVPS contacts on the other side of the interior, when some lady came in, plugged it in, and powered it up. I jumped out nearly cracking my skull open and said something like, "What are you trying to do, kill me or something?" "I just wanted to make a copy, God!" was her reply. In her defense, I did say a couple of insulting things after that about her intelligence level, but I did not use bad language. When I got back to the office, my boss told me she called and made a complaint. That I said some obscene things. I explained what happened, but some people should not be allowed to touch anything connected to electricity.

My favourite part of what you just said. So many potential offenders, not just in the copy tech biz, but anything involving any form of electronic device, from the simplest blenders to the "oh so complicated" magic voodoo boxes... I mean, computers.

[prntrfxr]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

My favourite part of what you just said. So many potential offenders, not just in the copy tech biz, but anything involving any form of electronic device, from the simplest blenders to the "oh so complicated" magic voodoo boxes... I mean, computers.

Exactly...I've got one of these type people working here. I've had salespeople and accounting people alike use the machines here without a hitch. Just the normal kind of repair. The second he touches it, I end up having to repair it. Whatever IT is... Be it the copier, fax machine, printer, paper fold machine, the postal machine (God I've got stories about that machine :facepalm: ) or his PC. (I finally got him to remove the tape before installing the toner cartridges.) One day he was out in the warehouse (don't ask me why), one of the receiving people needed the dumpster top open to throw some boxes on it. It has a hinge on the top facing the dock and has 2 plastic doors that flip over the top (see photo below). Well this non-electrical guy tried to help him, not by swinging the door towards himself to uncover one half, but for some reason he thought removing the large pin on the hinge was the secret way to open it. Fortunately, I stopped him before he had removed the entire pin. This photo was on the web and looks similar to ours, but shows it from the truck driver's view, not our view. Just the kind of brain trust you want in your accounting department. I'm sure he's a wiz with math, but with things electro-mechanical he needs to be told to back away slowly.

[Copier]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

Look at my avatar that was a book copier. Libarys loved them. I hated them can you say 16lbs developer no mag roll. Rest in peace 4000.

[KenB]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

Left a customer an hour ago who's been told her small A4 machine would make copies of books. Somehow she understood the machine would flip the pages without human intervention.

Oddly enough, Ricoh actually made a machine many years ago that would do this.

I don't think they ever sold any...thank God.

I posted a link to it some time ago on this site under some other thread, but don't remember which one.

[copymech]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

someone asked me a dumb question too. lol

[mojorolla]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

I was surprised I didn't see this one....

"Can you make the machine faster?"

If I had a dollar for every time I heard this, I could retire.

[blackcat4866]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

I had a similar thing happen to me. I was halfway in the machine trying to reach the HVPS contacts on the other side of the interior, when some lady came in, plugged it in, and powered it up. I jumped out nearly cracking my skull open and said something like, "What are you trying to do, kill me or something?" "I just wanted to make a copy, God!" was her reply. In her defense, I did say a couple of insulting things after that about her intelligence level, but I did not use bad language. When I got back to the office, my boss told me she called and made a complaint. That I said some obscene things. I explained what happened, but some people should not be allowed to touch anything connected to electricity.

My story is sort of the opposite scenario. I was upgrading firmware on a Copystar CS-250ci, standing right in front of the machine like I do. One of the real estate agents looks over my shoulder to see the "Firmware Upgrade 97%" screen (gee, what could that mean?), then reaches around the other side toward the power switch.

I grab his wrist two inches from the switch.
I say: "What are you doing?" (shocked look)
"Oh, my computer does this all the time. I just turn it off and on."
"Does it fix it?"
" ... um, no ..."
"You nearly just turned your MFP into a very effective doorstop."

This is why I never try to do firmware remotely. This guy tried to crash my firmware while I was standing there. =^..^=

[BLADE]

Re: Out of this world questions of the costumers.

My story is sort of the opposite scenario. I was upgrading firmware on a Copystar CS-250ci, standing right in front of the machine like I do. =^..^=

haa, if you stand in front of the machine watching firmware loading it looks like you dont know how to fix it (gold)