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Thread: One Liners

  1. #11
    How'd ya manage that? 500+ Posts zed255's Avatar
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    "Outside of a dog a book is man's best friend, inside of a dog it's too dark to read."

    Groucho Marx
    Zed
    One out of four people is mentally unbalanced.
    Think of your three closest friends...
    If they seem okay, then You're The One.

  2. #12
    just one copy?? 500+ Posts
    One Liners

    jonezy999's Avatar
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    Siting it the sun having a beer with my dad on a winters arvo
    ME: "It's nice in the sun"
    DAD: "It's even better in the daughter"

    Dad saw a hot girl walking down the street
    "I'd rather be hanging out of that than a 10 story building."
    I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. ~Thomas Edison

  3. #13
    Geek Extraordinaire 2,500+ Posts KenB's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jonezy999 View Post
    Siting it the sun having a beer with my dad on a winters arvo
    ME: "It's nice in the sun"
    DAD: "It's even better in the daughter"

    Dad saw a hot girl walking down the street
    "I'd rather be hanging out of that than a 10 story building."
    Sounds like your Dad is quite the interesting guy.
    Some days you’re the dog, some days you’re the fire hydrant.

  4. #14
    just one copy?? 500+ Posts
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    jonezy999's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KenB View Post
    Sounds like your Dad is quite the interesting guy.
    Yeh, to say the least. Also pretty handy with a screw driver. Not a bad boss either.
    I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. ~Thomas Edison

  5. #15
    Senior Tech 1,000+ Posts
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jules Winfield View Post
    I saw a little old lady getting mugged by three guys and had to get involved. She was a tough old broad, but in the end we got her purse...
    Damn funny!
    NEVER ASSUME ANYTHING

  6. #16
    Service Manager 1,000+ Posts
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    Lagonda's Avatar
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    One of the cadet salesmen was getting excited about making his first sale.

    One of the techs asked him if his mother really wanted to buy a printer.
    At least 50% of IT is a solution looking for a problem.

  7. #17
    just one copy?? 500+ Posts
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    jonezy999's Avatar
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    Here's two of the same,

    All over the place like a mad woman's shit

    or

    Shit everywhere like ya Grandma's undies.
    I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. ~Thomas Edison

  8. #18
    ALIEN OVERLORD 2,500+ Posts fixthecopier's Avatar
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    The cream will rise to the top, but remember some turds float also.
    The greatest enemy of knowledge isn't ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge. Stephen Hawking

  9. #19
    Senior Tech 100+ Posts 11x17's Avatar
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    The early bird may get the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese!

  10. #20
    Field Supervisor 500+ Posts HenryT2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lagonda View Post
    One of the cadet salesmen was getting excited about making his first sale.

    One of the techs asked him if his mother really wanted to buy a printer.

    I really like that one..........reminds me of some sales people I have known . On a really good month, they could manage to sell ONE unit ( to a friend or relative ) and the boss just loved them .

    11 X 17 That is worth contemplating ,
    Remember : SOME MISTAKES ARE TOO MUCH FUN TO ONLY MAKE ONCE !
    "The Senility Prayer" . . .
    God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.

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