Thread: Joke of the Day

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    Re: Joke of the Day


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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by slimslob View Post
    Even good idea is to use them (rockets) for stupidity... we may drop off most of our customers though
    A tree is known by its fruit, a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost, he who sows courtesy, reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.

    Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.

    I don't reply to private messages from end users.

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    Re: Joke of the Day

    WHAT STARTS WITH AN "F"

    A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her more precocious students. The teacher asked, 'Harry, what exactly is your problem?'
    Harry answered, 'I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!'

    Ms. Brooks finally had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.
    While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained the situation to the principal. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions, he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed.

    Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he happily agreed to take the test.
    Principal: 'What is 3 x 3?'Harry:'9.'
    Principal: 'What is6 x 6?'Harry:'36.'

    And so it went with every question the principal thought a bright 3rd grader should know.
    The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, 'You know, I reckon Harry can go to the 3rdgrade.'
    But Ms. Brooks is still skeptical of the little bugger and says to the principal, 'Not so fast, let me ask him a few questions.. 'The principal and Harry both agree.

    Ms. Brooks asks, 'What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?'
    Harry, after a moment: 'Legs..'
    Ms. Brooks: 'What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?'
    The principal wondered why would she ask such a question.
    Harry replied: 'Pockets’ ... to the Principal’s great relief...
    Ms. Brooks: 'What does a dog do that a man steps into? 'Harry: 'Pants.'
    By now, the principal is sitting forward with his mouth hanging open..
    Ms. Brooks: 'What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?'
    Harry: 'Shake hands.'

    The principal is now trembling with apprehension as Ms. Brooks asks the last question......
    Ms. Brooks: 'What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' and indicates a great deal of heat and excitement?'
    Harry: 'Firetruck.'

    The principal breaths a huge sigh of relief and tells the teacher, "Put the little shit in 5th-Grade, I got the last five questions wrong myself.."

  8. #5938
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Quote Originally Posted by izzynut View Post
    WHAT STARTS WITH AN "F"

    A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her more precocious students. The teacher asked, 'Harry, what exactly is your problem?'
    Harry answered, 'I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!'

    Ms. Brooks finally had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.
    While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained the situation to the principal. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions, he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed.

    Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he happily agreed to take the test.
    Principal: 'What is 3 x 3?'Harry:'9.'
    Principal: 'What is6 x 6?'Harry:'36.'

    And so it went with every question the principal thought a bright 3rd grader should know.
    The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, 'You know, I reckon Harry can go to the 3rdgrade.'
    But Ms. Brooks is still skeptical of the little bugger and says to the principal, 'Not so fast, let me ask him a few questions.. 'The principal and Harry both agree.

    Ms. Brooks asks, 'What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?'
    Harry, after a moment: 'Legs..'
    Ms. Brooks: 'What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?'
    The principal wondered why would she ask such a question.
    Harry replied: 'Pockets’ ... to the Principal’s great relief...
    Ms. Brooks: 'What does a dog do that a man steps into? 'Harry: 'Pants.'
    By now, the principal is sitting forward with his mouth hanging open..
    Ms. Brooks: 'What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?'
    Harry: 'Shake hands.'

    The principal is now trembling with apprehension as Ms. Brooks asks the last question......
    Ms. Brooks: 'What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' and indicates a great deal of heat and excitement?'
    Harry: 'Firetruck.'

    The principal breaths a huge sigh of relief and tells the teacher, "Put the little shit in 5th-Grade, I got the last five questions wrong myself.."
    They forgot to ask him one additional question. They should have also asked him he a turtle. Having already answered the entrance exam questions for the Ancient and Honorable Order of Turtles his prompt and proper answer should have been to say as loud as possible "You Bet Your Sweet Ass I Am."


  9. #5939
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    Re: Joke of the Day


  10. #5940
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    Re: Joke of the Day

    Pot bust made on Stoner Drive



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