The salesman said what?

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  • mrwho
    Major Asshole!

    Site Contributor
    2,500+ Posts
    • Apr 2009
    • 4299

    #31
    Originally posted by GUNit
    many years ago we swapped out a canon 400 that was shot. expecting to ditch this beast at the nearest dump you can imagine my surprise when the salesman said he had sold it. ok i thought give me a week or so to try and breath a little bit of life into the thing but oh no we were on our way there now fresh from just picking it up. bearing in mind the site was a school the dem wasnt going all that well when the headmaster asked what the paper clip holder was for only he didnt use the term paper clip holder he didnt know what it was. well said the salesman if you ever need a technician to come to the machine just touch that and an ultrasonic signal will be sent out and the technician will know exactly where to come. standing in the background was me mouth wide open almost feeling the heart attack coming over me. the guy bought the machine but two days later was on the phone saying ive been pressing the button and no-one has shown up. have a guess which idiot had to break the news that his hi tec button was a paperclip tray... yep you guessed it me...... not to mention the weight of those things when uplifting it that afternoon. salesman you gotta love em.this is 100% true


    Four words come to my mind after reading this one: "They'll Never Convict Me!"
    ' "But the salesman said . . ." The salesman's an asshole!'
    Mascan42

    'You will always find some Eskimo ready to instruct the Congolese on how to cope with heat waves.'

    Ibid

    I'm just an ex-tech lurking around and spreading disinformation!

    Comment

    • Keoke
      Technician
      • Nov 2007
      • 47

      #32
      Customers Suck

      Heres a few: what code names should techs use for these people?

      1. maybe toner is a supply item, but not a drum, or fuser rollers, those are parts.

      2. I'm not gonna pay this past due bill from 8 months ago, because it's having the same problem now 8 month later.

      3. It only took you 5 minutes to fix the machine, and you expect me to pay for the full hour?

      4. Oh by the way, since you fixed that one so quick can you take a look at these other 4 machines? You did say the the service charge was for the first hour right, and if there's time I've got some extra filing for you to do.

      5. You can't waste a couple of hours driving thru traffic and looking at my machine, for a free estimate?

      6. The new ADF kit you replaced sucks because it won't pull papers, that are still stapled together thru it, or these folded up wrinkled ones thru...you know it never had any problems when I first got it.

      You guys add some more, this just makes me bitter, lol Tell me again why I'm not a fishing guide up north enjoying nture and the outdoors, lol.

      Comment

      • vincent64
        Trusted Tech

        250+ Posts
        • Feb 2008
        • 382

        #33
        After reading all these, I can relate to a good many of them, but I have one, its when a salesperson makes the sale, and the address is a P.O. Box number in some little off the beaten path town.
        No physical location, just a PO box number.
        Had to call the delivery guys and ask where it was.
        And as far as refurb's go, as Peanut says, "polish a turd...it's still a turd"

        Comment

        • Keoke
          Technician
          • Nov 2007
          • 47

          #34
          Better yet, I've seen a copier go out, not working or passing a copy at all. The Sales Rep delivers the copier makes a bunch of copies with their old copier, then stick those in the ouput tray, have the customer come over and watches him put the original on the platen, and presses the print button, and voil'a a 500 page per minute machine, that also has a stealth mode that runs in Silent, lol I am not making this up. Strangely neither the company or the sales company are in business, who's stupider??? I'm not even sure that's a word, lol

          Comment

          • mascan42
            Trusted Tech

            250+ Posts
            • Oct 2008
            • 485

            #35
            Originally posted by Keoke
            Heres a few: what code names should techs use for these people?

            2. I'm not gonna pay this past due bill from 8 months ago, because it's having the same problem now 8 month later.

            3. It only took you 5 minutes to fix the machine, and you expect me to pay for the full hour?

            4. Oh by the way, since you fixed that one so quick can you take a look at these other 4 machines? You did say the the service charge was for the first hour right, and if there's time I've got some extra filing for you to do.

            5. You can't waste a couple of hours driving thru traffic and looking at my machine, for a free estimate?
            The secret code word is: deadbeat.

            Comment

            • fixthecopier
              ALIEN OVERLORD

              2,500+ Posts
              • Apr 2008
              • 4713

              #36
              How about the "Can I have a new one " customer.
              I just had this conversation.
              Customer..This machine is really outdated, what do I have to do to get a new one?
              Me..This machine is a year and a half old in a 5 year contract, you can not have a new one. You have never had a service call on this one.
              Customer... I need one that staples.
              Me.... This is your lucky day, I am a wizard in my spare time and I need to grant one more wish to meet my quota. Ala kazzam, Ala Kazzam I said as I tap my screwdriver on top of the doc feeder. "From this point on all you have to do is touch the "finishing" selection on the touch screen, and then touch "corner staple", saying Ala Kazzam is optional.
              I think she called me a smart ass before signing for the toner.
              The greatest enemy of knowledge isn't ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge. Stephen Hawking

              Comment

              • Shadow1
                Service Manager

                Site Contributor
                1,000+ Posts
                • Sep 2008
                • 1642

                #37
                "I couldn't get ahold of you to answer a tech question on a MP7001, so I talked them into an MPC7500"

                I knew the salesman was screwing with me because I was out of cell range and didn't return his phone call right away, but it still nearly cost him his life...
                73 DE W5SSJ

                Comment

                • Keoke
                  Technician
                  • Nov 2007
                  • 47

                  #38
                  lol, lol, lol, I think their should be a special psych ward designated to just copier techs.

                  Comment

                  • mrwho
                    Major Asshole!

                    Site Contributor
                    2,500+ Posts
                    • Apr 2009
                    • 4299

                    #39
                    Originally posted by Keoke
                    lol, lol, lol, I think their should be a special psych ward designated to just copier techs.
                    .
                    ' "But the salesman said . . ." The salesman's an asshole!'
                    Mascan42

                    'You will always find some Eskimo ready to instruct the Congolese on how to cope with heat waves.'

                    Ibid

                    I'm just an ex-tech lurking around and spreading disinformation!

                    Comment

                    • mjarbar

                      #40
                      Originally posted by mrwho
                      Now I know where my next 'holiday' is going to be!!!

                      Comment

                      • YouthAttack
                        Technician
                        • Mar 2010
                        • 37

                        #41
                        "but the salesman said it will..."
                        ah classic! i always tell my customers "maam/sir, would you trust a car salesman?"
                        customer: "of course not!" (long pause) "ooooohhh....

                        Comment

                        • nmfaxman
                          Service Manager

                          Site Contributor
                          1,000+ Posts
                          • Feb 2008
                          • 1702

                          #42
                          Originally posted by cboucher
                          Here's something one of our top salesmen would say to customers when he really wanted to sell the service department. One of us techs, the customer and this salesguy would all be talking and he would say this to the customer:

                          "(Name of whichever tech was standing there) has forgotten more about copiers and IT than you and I will ever know".

                          I always kind of suspected it was a back-handed compliment, but what do I know?...
                          I would have replied that I have adult ADHD, and looked at their faces with a blank stare.
                          Why do they call it common sense?

                          If it were common, wouldn't everyone have it?

                          Comment

                          • fixthecopier
                            ALIEN OVERLORD

                            2,500+ Posts
                            • Apr 2008
                            • 4713

                            #43
                            The new one I heard was "The salesman said this machine would last 15 years", talking about his 10 year old analog. I replied "Cars do that, but by that 15th year, I bet you know your mechanic real well"
                            The greatest enemy of knowledge isn't ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge. Stephen Hawking

                            Comment

                            • morgansterne
                              Technician

                              50+ Posts
                              • Oct 2007
                              • 83

                              #44
                              Originally posted by fixthecopier
                              The new one I heard was "The salesman said this machine would last 15 years", talking about his 10 year old analog. I replied "Cars do that, but by that 15th year, I bet you know your mechanic real well"
                              Tell her, "in that case, you have five years left."

                              Comment

                              • RRodgers
                                Service Manager

                                1,000+ Posts
                                • Jun 2009
                                • 1947

                                #45
                                I JUST had a salesman tell me on Monday.... and I QUOTE "Once it's signed... I don't care"
                                Color is not 4 times harder... it's 65,000 times harder. They call it "TECH MODE" for a reason. I have manual's and firmware for ya, course... you are going to have to earn it.

                                Comment

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