I was devastated to find out my wife was having an affair.
But I was able to come to terms with the whole thing by turning to religion.
I converted to Islam, and we're stoning her in the morning.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The wife suggested I get myself one of those penis enlargers, so I did.
She's 21 and her name is Jenny.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Went to the pub with my girlfriend last night. The locals were shouting "Paedophile!"
and other nasty names at me, just because my girlfriend is 21 and I'm 50.
It completely ruined our 10th anniversary.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The thing I love most about this hot weather is the short skirts and low cut tops --
although they do make me look a bit gay.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My son was thrown out of school today for letting a girl in his class give him a hand-job.
I said to him, "Son, that's 3 schools this year. You'd better stop before you're banned from
teaching altogether."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Prince William said he didn't want the traditional fruit-cake at his wedding.
Prince Phillip said he didn't give a toss, and went anyway
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The cost of living has now gotten so bad that my wife is having sex
with me because she can't afford batteries
But I was able to come to terms with the whole thing by turning to religion.
I converted to Islam, and we're stoning her in the morning.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The wife suggested I get myself one of those penis enlargers, so I did.
She's 21 and her name is Jenny.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Went to the pub with my girlfriend last night. The locals were shouting "Paedophile!"
and other nasty names at me, just because my girlfriend is 21 and I'm 50.
It completely ruined our 10th anniversary.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The thing I love most about this hot weather is the short skirts and low cut tops --
although they do make me look a bit gay.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My son was thrown out of school today for letting a girl in his class give him a hand-job.
I said to him, "Son, that's 3 schools this year. You'd better stop before you're banned from
teaching altogether."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Prince William said he didn't want the traditional fruit-cake at his wedding.
Prince Phillip said he didn't give a toss, and went anyway
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The cost of living has now gotten so bad that my wife is having sex
with me because she can't afford batteries
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