Murphy's Law on Copiers

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  • mrwho
    Major Asshole!

    Site Contributor
    2,500+ Posts
    • Apr 2009
    • 4299

    #1

    Murphy's Law on Copiers

    This is one most (if not all) of you will relate with. Some rules we all learn when repairing the machines and dealing with customers.

    - When a loose screw falls to the ground, it will always be half-an-inch farther that what you can reach with your magnetized screwdriver tip

    This one ocurred to me yesterday when I was on my knees fishing screws from under a machine I was servicing.

    What's with you, guys? Let's write a collective book!
    ' "But the salesman said . . ." The salesman's an asshole!'
    Mascan42

    'You will always find some Eskimo ready to instruct the Congolese on how to cope with heat waves.'

    Ibid

    I'm just an ex-tech lurking around and spreading disinformation!
  • vincent64
    Trusted Tech

    250+ Posts
    • Feb 2008
    • 382

    #2
    Here is 3 for the list.

    If you say a cust's name while at the shop, they will call in.

    If a cust tries out the machine you just got finished working on while your still in the copier room, it will break, again.

    A 30 min service call will take 3 hours.

    Comment

    • pepper38_cnd
      Field Service Manager

      Site Contributor
      1,000+ Posts
      • Aug 2005
      • 1075

      #3
      The copier fits perfectly in the spot the customer has made, not more than 2 inches clearance on all sides, and the shelf above it lets you almost open the DF.
      Online Store is closed. Chip resetting is a thing of the past! Thank you to all my past customers.
      Now into Ip TV KODI Boxes

      Comment

      • mascan42
        Trusted Tech

        250+ Posts
        • Oct 2008
        • 480

        #4
        If the customer brings up another problem as you're on the way out the door, it will take 3 times as long as the problem they actually called for.

        Comment

        • prntrfxr
          Service Manager

          1,000+ Posts
          • Apr 2008
          • 1627

          #5
          The copier fits perfectly in the spot the customer has made, not more than 2 inches clearance on all sides, and the shelf above it lets you almost open the DF.
          Try fixing one in a closet in the middle of a main walkway in a bail bond office of a major city, oh and I didn't mention the fact that there was no light in the closet. Not enough room to work in the closet either. I had to pull the machine into the walkway to turn it around. I had to do a PM and no place to put all the parts except in the walkway. Most of the people in there needed to be in jail. Not the kind of room you want to bend over to pick up anything up in(whether you're a guy or a girl).
          Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Coke in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO-HOO, what a ride!".

          Comment

          • mjarbar

            #6
            How about the fact that if you lose a screw down the back of a machine it will require you to take off all the main boards and power supply to retrieve it.

            Actually how about copier roulette, just like Russian roulette but will the copier work if you switch it on with the screw still down the back or will it be sparks and smoke!!!

            Comment

            • mrwho
              Major Asshole!

              Site Contributor
              2,500+ Posts
              • Apr 2009
              • 4299

              #7
              Originally posted by Vincent64
              If a cust tries out the machine you just got finished working on while your still in the copier room, it will break, again.
              That's why when I finish servicing a copier and the operator asks "Can I try it?", I answer most of the times "Sure, just give me a 5 minute head start!"

              Originally posted by mjarbar
              Actually how about copier roulette, just like Russian roulette but will the copier work if you switch it on with the screw still down the back or will it be sparks and smoke!!!
              I usually check if there's any horizontal board nearby where it might be resting. If there isn't, I just give the machine a good shake (in case it's sitting on a vertical-mounted board) to make the screw fall down and then, if I can't still pick it up, I just cross my fingers and turn it on!
              ' "But the salesman said . . ." The salesman's an asshole!'
              Mascan42

              'You will always find some Eskimo ready to instruct the Congolese on how to cope with heat waves.'

              Ibid

              I'm just an ex-tech lurking around and spreading disinformation!

              Comment

              • fixthecopier
                ALIEN OVERLORD

                2,500+ Posts
                • Apr 2008
                • 4714

                #8
                The further you have to drive, the more likely you forgot something.

                The more the boss raves about the new hire, the bigger a loser he will be.


                If the customer says he does not like the copier, you will never be done fixing it.

                Assholes get the problem machines.

                Really nice people, make you feel bad you could not fix it.

                And remember, that piece of crap machine you worked on once when someone was out, will break every time you do not have any thing else to do now.
                The greatest enemy of knowledge isn't ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge. Stephen Hawking

                Comment

                • TheOwl
                  Service Manager

                  Site Contributor
                  1,000+ Posts
                  • Nov 2008
                  • 1732

                  #9
                  When ever you tell the customer that the problem is an easy fix and just an operator setting.

                  You go to show the customer how to fix the problem and it ends up with the machine in a thousand pieces.
                  Please don't ask me for firmware or service manuals as refusal often offends.

                  Comment

                  • Shadow1
                    Service Manager

                    Site Contributor
                    1,000+ Posts
                    • Sep 2008
                    • 1642

                    #10
                    The chance a customer will want a full technical explanation of what you did is inversely proportional to the chance the customer is capable of understanding it.
                    73 DE W5SSJ

                    Comment

                    • mrwho
                      Major Asshole!

                      Site Contributor
                      2,500+ Posts
                      • Apr 2009
                      • 4299

                      #11
                      Originally posted by Shadow1
                      The chance a customer will want a full technical explanation of what you did is inversely proportional to the chance the customer is capable of understanding it.
                      Well, that one doesn't sound so bad - you just fill it with jargon and tech-speak and the customer will just nod dumbly.

                      I used that one on a customer's kid when I was off-time looking at a computer problem - graphics driver update.

                      Kid: "What are you doing?"
                      Me: "I'm just updating the graphics driver."
                      Kid: "You're what the what?!?"

                      Sadly, grown ups usually don't go this far, they just turn dumb-mode ON and keep nodding away!
                      ' "But the salesman said . . ." The salesman's an asshole!'
                      Mascan42

                      'You will always find some Eskimo ready to instruct the Congolese on how to cope with heat waves.'

                      Ibid

                      I'm just an ex-tech lurking around and spreading disinformation!

                      Comment

                      • ToshibaTech
                        Senior Tech

                        500+ Posts
                        • Apr 2007
                        • 580

                        #12
                        If you see a unique problem today. You will see it 2 or 3 more times within a week.

                        If you think about taking your vacuum in and don't you will have to go back and get it along with a manual and several parts.

                        If you didn't double check the thing you just thought about going down the road then you either left it out or didn't put it back together right. Trying to convince your self otherwise only makes the customer call back sooner.

                        The most complex problem you imagine on your way to a call will inevitably be what is actually wrong with the machine.
                        I will not give you service manuals or firmware.

                        Comment

                        • davidj7
                          Service Manager

                          Site Contributor
                          1,000+ Posts
                          • Jan 2009
                          • 1107

                          #13
                          If one machine needs a spare, rest of the machines in the same area needs it too.
                          a machine is only as good as your tech : source:screwtape ; the scary one

                          Comment

                          • donaldtex
                            Technician
                            • May 2009
                            • 43

                            #14
                            If you choose not to take with you the bulky manual next time, you will NEED it with the next machine,

                            EVERYONE will be staring at you while you are trying to find how to clear a jam/install toner in the new machine you're not yet familiar with.

                            Comment

                            • KenB
                              Geek Extraordinaire

                              2,500+ Posts
                              • Dec 2007
                              • 3945

                              #15
                              The likelihood of being forced to pay for parking soars astronomically when you have moths in your wallet.
                              “I think you should treat good friends like a fine wine. That’s why I keep mine locked up in the basement.” - Tim Hawkins

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