BBQ Rules

[Supertech]

BBQ RULES

We are about to enter the summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity, as it's the only type of cooking a 'real' man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved.

When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:

Routine...

(1) The woman buys the food.
(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.

Here comes the important part:

(4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

More routine....

(5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
(6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation.

Important again:

(7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.!

More routine....

(8) The woman prepares the! plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
(9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.

And most important of all:

(10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
(11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women

[knightfall]

this is up there with mans rule but with better format and number system, thanks

[unisys12]

Not trying to dig up an old thread, but... I have a problem with Step's 1 & 3.

They should be replaced by a man doing those tasked and replaced with a woman bring beers outside for the man. I mean... come on... one beer during a BBQ!!?? Who's heard of such a thing?

That is a internet response - My real world response is more like ...

Man buys meat
Man prepares meat
Man gets beer and lights grill
Man gets another beer
Man brings meat outside and gets another beer
Man put meat on grill - grabs another beer
Man flips meat on grill - grabs yet another beer when getting up
- At this point, woman must step in on the burning of the meat.
Man gets up to remove burning meat... grabbing yet another beer
Woman tells man that the table is ready and everyone is waiting on him...
Man looks surprised... Grabs a beer and says, "Well, were waiting on you babe!"
Man comes inside with beer and meat in hand... Everyone else, but the man, really knows who did all the work that day.

[dwparker.wa]

You mean, women can TOUCH food without destroying it? My wife can't even make instant oatmeal!
Parker