The guy who needs his ass kicked is.....

[fixthecopier]

O.K. You know the deal, what asshole made your job harder by not thinking. I'll start.
The guy who needs his ass kicked is the asshole at Konica Minolta who decided to quit putting handles on the larger boxes and made me crush my fingers getting a C500 over a tight door jam. That bitch is heavy!

[kyoceradude]

The guy who needs his ass kicked is the sales rep who sold a KM-8530 to a customer, who's office is located down a flight of old wooden stairs in a church basement. Not to mention the doorway is only 27 3/4" wide (with the stops removed) machine is 30 1/2 ". Had to totaly disassemble and remove the front of the machine (doors, op panel, cassettes and frames that hold them, ets...) to make it narrower, because the customer was not going to let us remove the DOOR JAM.......

[redime]

Delivery has had to HAND CARRY a Konica Minolta Bizhub 600 up church stairs one step at a time... took 4 guys.

Ive personally been on a delivery before of a C500 that was being delivered to a church. Those of you that have accounts there know God doesnt love handicapped people, because no 99.99% of churches are not handicapp accessible, I and my boss have to puss the machine up 6 steps at a 45 degree angle because there was no way to back the truck up - it was take out a parking meter, or take out a water main... not fun

The guy that needs his ass kicked, is actually a girl. Who will take inkjet transparencies and with a row of three machines try them in one copier. It melts in the fuser and machine is down... then tries the next machine.... does the same thing, and of course tries in the last machine and takes all three copiers down in one swoop!

Or the girl who scratches the drum with a letter opener, insists it wasnt her - when its sitting on her desk with the green coating on the end of it.

I could go on for DAYS!

[Star]

The guy who needs his ass kicked is the guy at Ricoh that keeps changing the damn part numbers. Must be some big wig's nephew that needed a job.

Another guy who needs his ass kicked is the contract customer that I caught in the act of digging in his fuser with a screwdriver. Then has a huge fit when he is billed, #1 "because HE has a contract", and #2 because "he wouldn't have been digging in there if the piece of junk hadn't jammed in the first place"!

I could go on....... but I'd probably not leave any space for anyone else to comment, LOL!

Regards

[banginbishop]

[FMC]

The guy who needs his ass kicked is the guy at Ricoh that keeps changing the damn part numbers. Must be some big wig's nephew that needed a job.

Gotta agree with you on that one.I seem to get random parts sent to me, only to discover that its an updated part that bears no resemblance to the old part.Give me Konica part numbers anyday that went up by one number and the first 4 letters and numbers tied up to the machine.

[Travis06]

The guy who needs his ass kicked, is the guy who has a 7 year old machine and main drive gears/belts need replaced. So we rip the copier apart and it takes 2 people all day to get it apart and back together so the douche bag says "if it takes this long, why don't you just bring me a new machine?"

[knightfall]

the guy who needs his ask kicked is the one at Ricoh who put the ld optic shutter motor (thats 1"x2") in a way that you have to basically remove the whole drive assembly, registration roller and clutch, guide plates to replace.

[aodtech]

The geniuses working at Verizon or any other phone company who can find "nothing wrong" with customers' phone lines (even though there obviously is). Customers thought: If there is nothing wrong with the lines, then it must be the equipment.

Customer: Machine's broken, not receiving faxes.
Tech: Machine is fine. Checked line with other fax machines, same problem.
Customer: Verizon said...
Tech: Even plugged in regular phone, tried calling with cell phone. Problem is with phone line.
Customer: But Verizon said...
Tech: Took machine back to shop. Plugged in our phone line. Worked OK. Brought it back to your location, problem is with phone line.
Customer: But Verizon said phone lines are fine. Fix it or we're cancelling our contract.

Two weeks later...
Customer: Machine is working fine. Verizon said a wire was loose in the box causing the problem.

GRRRRR!!!

While we're at it, can the customer get a nice bitchslapping as well?

[paul bristol uk]

Damn foreign johnnies, no bloody idea at all. Copiers should be made with wing nuts. Spin them up and a little tweak with pliers. job done!
BTW You mean you put all the screws back in the covers?

I love sharp for putting Laser Units in places where you have to dismantle the whole sodding copier to get at it!

P.S. Do you want to buy a few thousand surplus screws I have pockets full of them

[blackcat4866]

That AR-163 laser is a treat, isn't it. Once you've got the four screws for the laser there are no covers, no boards, half the drive assembly is off, and you can reach all the way through the middle of the machine. The first one I replaced was sitting on a file cabinet in a tight little corner. I would strip one side, rotate 90 degrees, strip another side, rotate 90 degrees, etc..

Thanks Sharp.

[laserman06]

[quote=banginbishop;38956]The designers at Ricoh, Sharp, Kyocera and all the other copier manufacturers who put in TO MANY BLEEDING SCREWS to take a back panel off and make it a F****N nightmare to do the simplest of jobs. /quote]

You fellow techs, never got the memo. The President of _________(fill in the blank) Copier company as a brother-n law, who is the President of the Screw company. So contrary to popular belief, the number of screws to take off a back cover is not to hinder the tech, but a simple manner of business and family mixing. After all if momma ain't happy, nobody is

One of my beefs is they put nice round corners for the customer on the outside. But, sharp edges on the inside. I don't know about you all, but I have given a lot of blood to these machines.

[fixthecopier]

Let us not forget wire harness. How many times have you had to pull 3 or 4 more covers off to plug in that clutch or motor, just because some designer could not see fit to add another inch or two to the harness. I am thinking power supply for minolta di2010/3510, and don't forget the top tray feed clutch on same machine.




__________________________________________________ _
Life is tuff, it's tuffer if you are stupid

[leroyal]

The geniuses working at Verizon or any other phone company who can find "nothing wrong" with customers' phone lines (even though there obviously is). Customers thought: If there is nothing wrong with the lines, then it must be the equipment.

Customer: Machine's broken, not receiving faxes.
Tech: Machine is fine. Checked line with other fax machines, same problem.
Customer: Verizon said...
Tech: Even plugged in regular phone, tried calling with cell phone. Problem is with phone line.
Customer: But Verizon said...
Tech: Took machine back to shop. Plugged in our phone line. Worked OK. Brought it back to your location, problem is with phone line.
Customer: But Verizon said phone lines are fine. Fix it or we're cancelling our contract.

Two weeks later...
Customer: Machine is working fine. Verizon said a wire was loose in the box causing the problem.

GRRRRR!!!

While we're at it, can the customer get a nice bitchslapping as well?

Have you noticed Verizon sends out 2 flannel shirts before they send out someone who knows what he's doing?

[leroyal]

The guy who needs his ass kicked is the Toner Pirate who says, "yep, OEM" and your boss for believing him.