What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

[chrisban35]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

Actually, the TRUE classic, which I hear at least once a week is: "But it was just working right before it broke"... And I always reply, "but he was alive, right before he died"... They usually go, oh, now I feel stupid... LOL

[supertype]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

I got a call from a customer saying "your machine is not duplexing!" i asked why he thought that "well the machine is only pulling the paper in 1 time and not a 2nd pass for the reverse side" I asked him to check the copies it had made and to his surprise it was duplexed. I explained sir this model has a front and back scanner in 1 pass............................................. click..

[drwevil]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

I had a customer yesterday that I wanted them to do a manual call to @remote to speed up a remote firmware update on a Ricoh....

I said "Press the yellow All clear button....." then I hear silence they come back and said "I pressed it and nothing happened...." I said "Well there are more buttons to push......."

[drwevil]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

One I always get when helping someone over the phone to say add an address book entry on a Ricoh....

Me: The username is admin and there is no password
Customer: I typed Edmund and no password and it doesn't work......
Me: Edmund???? it's "admin" A D M I N admin ... and leave the password blank....
Customer: Ohhhh sorry your accent

I have a Kiwi acccent.....

[iliketui]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

One I always get when helping someone over the phone to say add an address book entry on a Ricoh....

Me: The username is admin and there is no password
Customer: I typed Edmund and no password and it doesn't work......
Me: Edmund???? it's "admin" A D M I N admin ... and leave the password blank....
Customer: Ohhhh sorry your accent

I have a Kiwi acccent.....

I have the exact same problem. I learnt pretty quickly to say "the username is admin, a d m i n"

[Brett GS]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

But why do the rollers wear out?? Get thay so often.

[iliketui]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

I went to a customer one day for problems scanning (scan to folder).

I sent a test to each of the users in the address book (about 6) then checked the scan history and saw nothing but completed.

Went over to the user having the problem and asked them to show me the destination folder that the scans end up in. He said it goes to the top when he receives them and opened the document at the top of the list and said " see its not there".

I asked him to open the document at the bottom of the list and sure enough there it was. I hope he now remembers how to sort by name.

[chrisban35]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

I went to a customer one day for problems scanning (scan to folder).

I sent a test to each of the users in the address book (about 6) then checked the scan history and saw nothing but completed.

Went over to the user having the problem and asked them to show me the destination folder that the scans end up in. He said it goes to the top when he receives them and opened the document at the top of the list and said " see its not there".

I asked him to open the document at the bottom of the list and sure enough there it was. I hope he now remembers how to sort by name.

You mean "Sort By Date"...

[iliketui]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

You mean "Sort By Date"...

Name/date/size.... Whatever he chooses

[Kurtillton]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

When i work on PC repairs a woman caled me over asking for a baby screen, i asked what she ment

Her: well my screen keeps getting taller, so can i have a baby screen

I laugh and walk off, turns out her friend was adjusting the screen every other day and told her it hit puberty and was having growth spurters.

[justanotherhack]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

One of my associates was called out to a DUPLEX jamming problem, and when he asked the customer to demonstrate the issue, the guy pulled out some transparencies...

[KapeKopyTek]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

Not exactly compliant with the theme here, but close:

From the service history of 1 coin op machine in a public library, 3 different calls-

72 pennies in coin acceptor
15 pennies, bent quarter, Canadian quarter, dime, and nickel jammed in coin acceptor
business cards inserted into bill acceptor

Today I was at a machine for jamming out of tray 1, first thing I did was remove 5 sheets of severely dog-eared pages from the bottom of the tray, and ran almost a hundred pages with no jams. The woman INSISTED that the paper was not the issue. I am weary of trying to reason with people, so I made a show of cleaning rollers and paper path, told her the machine was all set. My heart just aint in it any more.

[racefreak]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

On a KM C7000, the customer called because she was having trouble printing flesh tones. I arrived to find red construction paper in the machine. When I told her she needed to use white paper, she asked why can't we put in white toner. I opened the toner door asked her where to put it. She said " do we just take one out and replace it with white?" I then opened the paper tray and said "There". She looked at me rather dumb and said "Do we just sprinkle it in?" I wanted so bad to take away her machine. She was clearly too dumb to own it.

[blackcat4866]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

Not exactly compliant with the theme here, but close:

From the service history of 1 coin op machine in a public library, 3 different calls-

72 pennies in coin acceptor
15 pennies, bent quarter, Canadian quarter, dime, and nickel jammed in coin acceptor
business cards inserted into bill acceptor

Today I was at a machine for jamming out of tray 1, first thing I did was remove 5 sheets of severely dog-eared pages from the bottom of the tray, and ran almost a hundred pages with no jams. The woman INSISTED that the paper was not the issue. I am weary of trying to reason with people, so I made a show of cleaning rollers and paper path, told her the machine was all set. My heart just aint in it any more.

There for a while we had Canon coinop machines at this grocery store chain. I never knew what I was going to find.

1) coins shoved in every seam of the operation panel, and in the bypass tray
2) the machine is sitting in an entryway with 4" of snow, and the doors opening and closing 20 times per minute. The temperature varied from 30F to 50F, depending on which door was open. Also damage to the covers from getting slammed with grocery carts.
3) calls for folded paper, too much paper, odd sized paper, no paper, snow covered paper ... did I miss anything?
4) damaged operation panels, nearly every call. At one location, there was a person who would punch holes through the operation panel sticker with a pen.

They insisted that it was not misuse. =^..^=

[theengel]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

I could not imagine putting a coin-op under contract. That's a losing deal.