Snappy comebacks

[igi]

Re: Snappy comebacks

Hi
am i the only one that gets in to trouble
when a clever remark is on offer-one of my latest snappy replys got me a warning letter from my boss.
the lady customer asked me? its you again we need to make you a permanent office next to mine,
i reply no tanx i already married,oops wrong reply

[fixthecopier]

Re: Snappy comebacks

Hi
am i the only one that gets in to trouble
when a clever remark is on offer-one of my latest snappy replys got me a warning letter from my boss.
the lady customer asked me? its you again we need to make you a permanent office next to mine,
i reply no tanx i already married,oops wrong reply

I have written worse things ON the copier in marker.

[igi]

Re: Snappy comebacks

I have written worse things ON the copier in marker.

your boss must be very understanding

[Coptech]

Re: Snappy comebacks

I like to tell people "There are days that I almost think I could do this for a living"

[michaelc]

Re: Snappy comebacks

I say this now and again, once I did as I was leaving and the person did not get the joke.


Its working but you can not press the green button or it will break again.....

[fixthecopier]

Re: Snappy comebacks

your boss must be very understanding

He was not happy about it, made me go remove it, but I did not apologize. I think I used the word'stupid" because it was one of those days that i had been overloaded with stupid. Let me tell you about it.

The call on a di251 was for jamming.
I show up and decide it needed a part in tray 2.
I tell the person there that I need to order a part, don't use tray 2.

Day 2, customer calls shop, says I was there yesterday but it is still jamming.
I go back, find paper in tray 2.
I remove tray 2 and set it behind the machine, tell a different person that I will be back when part comes in.

Day 3, customer calls to say machine is still jamming.
I return, remove tray 2 from machine again, put in my truck and leave.
About 2 hours later, they call the shop to say that part of their machine is gone and they want to know what is going on.

I feel I was justified in writing the word "stupid" on the machine.

[mojorolla]

Re: Snappy comebacks

Customer: "Can I axe you a question?"
Me: "Can I stab you an answer?"

This has gotten me in trouble countless times.

[igi]

Re: Snappy comebacks

He was not happy about it, made me go remove it, but I did not apologize. I think I used the word'stupid" because it was one of those days that i had been overloaded with stupid. Let me tell you about it.

The call on a di251 was for jamming.
I show up and decide it needed a part in tray 2.
I tell the person there that I need to order a part, don't use tray 2.

Day 2, customer calls shop, says I was there yesterday but it is still jamming.
I go back, find paper in tray 2.
I remove tray 2 and set it behind the machine, tell a different person that I will be back when part comes in.

Day 3, customer calls to say machine is still jamming.
I return, remove tray 2 from machine again, put in my truck and leave.
About 2 hours later, they call the shop to say that part of their machine is gone and they want to know what is going on.

I feel I was justified in writing the word "stupid" on the machine.

i take my hat in front of you,wow well done patience of (job)

[CableGuy]

Re: Snappy comebacks

"How long is it going to last this time?"

"It's guaranteed to work until it breaks."

They usually get 'Until you break it again'

22 years in the field has dulled my sense of humour somewhat

[kingarthur]

Re: Snappy comebacks

A common question I get when i have a m/c in pieces

"Do you know how to put it back together"

my usual reply

"Well, actually I was hoping that someone here saw me take it apart, so they can tell me what goes where"...

[michaelc]

Re: Snappy comebacks

I have had the usual comments when the machine is in a atleast 100 bits around you.

I mumble under my breath ' i should have stuck with fixing toasters and kettles, worst week of my life.....'

[mrwho]

Re: Snappy comebacks

A common question I get when i have a m/c in pieces

"Do you know how to put it back together"

my usual reply

"Well, actually I was hoping that someone here saw me take it apart, so they can tell me what goes where"...

Great one! I'll say, with a mix of surprise and horror on my face "What, you don't know how??!?"

[StrippedScrew]

Re: Snappy comebacks

A common question I get when i have a m/c in pieces

"Do you know how to put it back together"

my usual reply

"Well, actually I was hoping that someone here saw me take it apart, so they can tell me what goes where"...

HA, usually I just tell them " I just take it apart, the guy that puts it together won't be in till next Tuesday " and enjoy the look on their face while they try to figure out if I'm really joking or not.

[Iowatech]

Re: Snappy comebacks

Great one! I'll say, with a mix of surprise and horror on my face "What, you don't know how??!?"

Or, "No. The guy that does know will be coming by next week, though."

[Shadow1]

Re: Snappy comebacks

Not work related, but still a good one... So good, I didn't dare use it under the circumstances.

When I first moved to Mississippi I was working with a small computer company, but occasionally work would dry up enough that the boss had us out working on his farm. We were running fence, and there's not many tools required for the job, but one of the boss' sons kept losing them in the back of the truck - not really hard to do since there's dozens of t-bars and bales of barbed wire and it's easy for things to slide around.

We were both probably about 19 at the time, and there's not much to do while running fence except give each other a hard time. After the umpteenth time he had to look for something I finally blurted out, "Geez, Dude! You'd lose your dick if it wasn't attached!"

Little did I know the boss' daugther had walked out to bring us some drinks - a very welcome act of kindness since it was hot, it's hard work, and she was barely 17 and extremely well put together. She overheard my comment, and has a sense of humor. (thankfully most of their family does)

Later that night while eating dinner (one of the bennies when we did farm work was dinner at the boss' house) I had a hard time holding on to things. After pounding posts and stringing wire in the sun all day I was a little shaky and kept dropping things. The daughter finally busted out with my comment from earlier, "You'd drop your dick if it wasn't attached!"

Everybody knew the story by then, so it was good for a laugh, but I came up with a real zinger...

"Would you like to make sure it's screwed on tight?"

Of course I didn't dare say it then, but I did say "Why is it you only come up with the really good comebacks when you can't use them."

Everybody had a pretty good idea what it was, but there's some things you just don't say to the boss' teenage daughter while he's sitting there with a knife in hand.