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Color is not 4 times harder... it's 65,000 times harder.
They call it "TECH MODE" for a reason. I have manual's and firmware for ya, course... you are going to have to earn it. -
Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?
I find its nurses that are the worst offenders, those tender healing hand can smash the crap out of copier.
We're just about to give a medical imaging company a bill for two and a half g's for the damaged they did to the fuser and duplex path on a mid sized multi-function machine.At least 50% of IT is a solution looking for a problem.Comment
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Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?
I have just spent the last 4 hours reading the whole of this thread from start to finish!! (Slow day today)
Over the last 20 years, I have come across pretty much all of the posted stupid questions and comments (Oh, how I hate people walking past me when I'm elbow deep in toner, and saying "You should get an office here" or "Is it broken again"..... No you twat, someone in this very office HAS BROKEN THE COPIER AGAIN, THE DON'T BREAK THEMSELVES!!!)
Quiet possibly the most horrendous thing I have ever seen was on an old Canon 9800....... 5pm - Dec 20th 1997...... Get a call from a customer (HSBC in St. Albans UK, wasn't called HSBC at the time, but I digress) "Can an engineer come out, we have a problem with the copier"..... Why of course, nothing I would like more than to come out and look at your copier at home time...... I asked if it could wait until the morning, apparently not, its VERY urgent...... OK I said.
Get to the customer, and there is an ambulance outside, and a fire engine.....
Went to the reception, found out that a rather large bottomed lady had got drunk at the office christmas party, and decided to copy her ample ass on the copier..... the glass broke, her ass got wedged with large shards of glass sticking in from all directions. She couldnt be hoisted out as that was just causing her to get more glass in her ass, they couldnt take the glass out for obvious reasons.
I ended up having to strip the whole copier down around her, even parts of the frame, all covered in blood and a fat girl crying.
Copier was condemned, girl never came back to work apparently
So, let this be a lesson, dont get pissed and copy your ass, especially if youre over a certain weight
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Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?
I did get a call from a customer saying they tried to load staples into their KM 3060 and that the staples just fell down the hole....so I show up and ask where they loaded the staples....and they open the lil door on the side where the handle pops up for lifting the machine...so dig out my magnet and went fishing for staples....then trained them on where the actual staple unit was on the finisher...."In a cruel and evil world, being cynical can allow you to get some entertainment out of it."
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Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?
A few years back, a major account called my boss on Saturday. They had an executive who was going to Dallas on Sunday and could not print a report he needed to take. I go there and call the guy's cell phone to come down and let me in (they are normally closed on weekends). Lug all my tools up to the second floor (no elevator). Walk up to the Savin 8075 and there is a red light on the printer only. Push the printer button and read please load 8 1/2 X 11 paper. 3000 sheet tandem tray 1 and 3000 sheet LCT both empty. Loaded paper for him and was off to my weekend.Comment
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Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?
During that moment, you were... a surgeon... of sorts.I have just spent the last 4 hours reading the whole of this thread from start to finish!! (Slow day today)
Over the last 20 years, I have come across pretty much all of the posted stupid questions and comments (Oh, how I hate people walking past me when I'm elbow deep in toner, and saying "You should get an office here" or "Is it broken again"..... No you twat, someone in this very office HAS BROKEN THE COPIER AGAIN, THE DON'T BREAK THEMSELVES!!!)
Quiet possibly the most horrendous thing I have ever seen was on an old Canon 9800....... 5pm - Dec 20th 1997...... Get a call from a customer (HSBC in St. Albans UK, wasn't called HSBC at the time, but I digress) "Can an engineer come out, we have a problem with the copier"..... Why of course, nothing I would like more than to come out and look at your copier at home time...... I asked if it could wait until the morning, apparently not, its VERY urgent...... OK I said.
Get to the customer, and there is an ambulance outside, and a fire engine.....
Went to the reception, found out that a rather large bottomed lady had got drunk at the office christmas party, and decided to copy her ample ass on the copier..... the glass broke, her ass got wedged with large shards of glass sticking in from all directions. She couldnt be hoisted out as that was just causing her to get more glass in her ass, they couldnt take the glass out for obvious reasons.
I ended up having to strip the whole copier down around her, even parts of the frame, all covered in blood and a fat girl crying.
Copier was condemned, girl never came back to work apparently
So, let this be a lesson, dont get pissed and copy your ass, especially if youre over a certain weightComment
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Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?
just last week - youre here to get the green paper out ? my prints keep coming out on green paper !
no, you need IT for thatComment
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Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?
Customer wants to buy a copier for her home. Little old lady. She comes in to shop and we show her the smallest copier ever made in the history of copiers? Toshiba 4121 or something like that ? As soon as she sees it she stops in her tracks and says , THAT SURE IS BIG. ( doesn't,t the machine have to be as big as a piece of 11x 8.5 piece of paper ? ) Funny. I showed her a toy copier I had on my desk. Told her you take your copy paper , cut it into about 10 pieces, load them into your paper tray. Then cut your original into 10 pieces and make 10 deffernt copies and the tape them back together. Then you can get a real small copier ? L o l.Comment
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Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?
About a year ago I got called to a lawyers office on a Bizhub 421 saying they couldn't get the toner loaded into the machine correctly. Common issue with this model, as the collar on the toner tray can become misaligned with the tray and the bottle won't fit 100% in it.
As I'm walking in to the customers office, I look at the receptionist and say I'm here to repair the copier, at that exact moment, I look over her shoulder and see the lawyer put the bottle in, close the two doors as best as he can, hold them in place, pick his foot up and KICK THE DOOR AS HARD AS HE CAN to get it to hopefully close. I heard the worst sound in the world as he Bruce Lee'd this damn machine. I walked up to him, said "Why?" and pulled the toner doors apart, pulled the bottle out, aligned the now broken collar and just sighed. This guy looks at me and goes "Well they should tell us about that!". Without missing a beat, I grabbed the box the toner came in and showed him the 6 pictures on the side of the box that distinctly warn the user about this.
He broke the toner tray, toner latches,the toner supply system, motors and OACB with that kick. And I charged him $1,000 to fix it, even though they were on contract and collected the check myself.Comment
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Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?
LOL I had a similar one a couple of years back, a good troubleshooter that I am, wanted to get to the bottom of it, I pulled out my phone with the "Dog Whistle" App and let it rip.... sure enough, she peaked out her head to find out where the noise was comming out of....... PREICELESS.......!!
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Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?
Fax related call....
Customer complained that the fax would not send!
I asked her to show me what the problem was an she inserted a page in the machine, dialed a number and pressed send. We watched the page disappear into the machine and then reappear out the exit, to her screaming "See! It didn't go anywhere!! It's coming out the front!"
I had to explain that the machine did not screw up the paper and stuff it into the phone line.. Still not sure if she believed me....
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Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?
Fax related call....
Customer complained that the fax would not send!
I asked her to show me what the problem was an she inserted a page in the machine, dialed a number and pressed send. We watched the page disappear into the machine and then reappear out the exit, to her screaming "See! It didn't go anywhere!! It's coming out the front!"
I had to explain that the machine did not screw up the paper and stuff it into the phone line.. Still not sure if she believed me....
Should have told her that there are some Gremmlins that copy the information really fast, then call the Gremmlins on the other machine, The Other Gremmlins write down the information and print it for the recipient to see
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Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?
Well cordless12, I think you customer might CLUELESS.Fax related call....
Customer complained that the fax would not send!
I asked her to show me what the problem was an she inserted a page in the machine, dialed a number and pressed send. We watched the page disappear into the machine and then reappear out the exit, to her screaming "See! It didn't go anywhere!! It's coming out the front!"
I had to explain that the machine did not screw up the paper and stuff it into the phone line.. Still not sure if she believed me....Comment
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