What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

[randall]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

Customer: what was wrong with it?
Me: (a little to enthusiastically explain) this error code relates to...and....
Customer (blank stare)what did you do to fix it?
Me: (holding out inevitable pocket screws) it broke down with a case of too many screws

[Lagonda]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

"You have to fix it NOW, it's a patient critical printer!"





So has there been a huge medical break through while I wasn't looking and they now use printers as part of a medical procedure?
So you can't print labels out because you insist on trying use cut price El Cheapo labels and they've now jammed the printer solid?
Tough, write them out by hand.

[audyplongo]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

all these stories are hilarious customers can defiantly be a little dumb sometimes

[jmaister]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

I walk into a old client to give them the low down on whats going on(bad news, and where to go from here.. ).

I got 5 mins of sales 101.

[sturmtrooper]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

I once pulled and entire sheet of staples out of a single pass document feeder after getting a call for jamming. I was deeply unamused. Guess they decided to reload the staple cartridge over the doc feeder and failed.

[Iowatech]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

I once pulled and entire sheet of staples out of a single pass document feeder after getting a call for jamming. I was deeply unamused. Guess they decided to reload the staple cartridge over the doc feeder and failed.

Heh, was there a wastebasket within two or three steps of the machine? That's usually the case here.

[gear13z]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

I was working on a copier machine, I have taken out the pcu, leaving all the doors open, then someone approach me asking if she can photocopy.

[Iowatech]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

I was working on a copier machine, I have taken out the pcu, leaving all the doors open, then someone approach me asking if she can photocopy.

Heh, classic.
I've probably shared this before here (sorry), but one time I had just got a machine I was working on fully reassembled and was about to turn it on when a guy came up and asked if he could make copies. I told him "No, because the machine is off.". He got the weirdest look on his face and went away. I actually felt bad about that for a while.

[sturmtrooper]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

Heh, was there a wastebasket within two or three steps of the machine? That's usually the case here.

There wasn't one nearby quite that close. When I was done I asked the secretary if they had reloaded the stapler recently and she said they had, and had dropped some but thought they got them all.

Now of course if she had told me this to start with I could have saved a good 30+ minutes of diagnosis.

[fixthecopier]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

When it comes to staplers, customers seem to assume that they take the regular staples they use in their desk top stapler. I once went to a call on a Bizhub 350 for stapler not working. They had removed and tossed the cartridge from the machine and laid a piece of the staple ream from a plain old stapler in the open cavity where the cartridge used to be. Just laid it in there like this was a Jetsons cartoon and a little pair of robot arms was going to come out and load them somewhere.

[Heleric]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

Customer placed a service call saying no one could print. When I get there I find they all had new computers. Told her I would need to reinstall the print drivers. Computers were all locked down to the point where it was asking for an administrator password to add a printer. I told her she would have to contact her IT for the password. And she said I don't understand why you don't know the password to install the printer, it is your printer isn't it? I said you need the computer password, there is no way I would know the password to your BRAND NEW computers. She got frustrated and asked me to leave. Didn't even leave the parking lot when my boss called and said the customer just called him and told him I was very rude and not at all helpful.

[fixthecopier]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

Customer placed a service call saying no one could print. When I get there I find they all had new computers. Told her I would need to reinstall the print drivers. Computers were all locked down to the point where it was asking for an administrator password to add a printer. I told her she would have to contact her IT for the password. And she said I don't understand why you don't know the password to install the printer, it is your printer isn't it? I said you need the computer password, there is no way I would know the password to your BRAND NEW computers. She got frustrated and asked me to leave. Didn't even leave the parking lot when my boss called and said the customer just called him and told him I was very rude and not at all helpful.

Plastic surgery and weight loss can fix ugly, but nothing can fix stupid.

[sturmtrooper]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

Plastic surgery and weight loss can fix ugly, but nothing can fix stupid.

Some people are ugly on the outside, and some are ugly on the inside.

[cyph0r26]

Re: What is the dumbist customer comment/question you've heard?

I would have stuck my meter leads into vents in the back of the machine and made my meter beep a little, then tell her the best I could do 3/4 impulse. Warp engines are offline and it will cost $250.00 to repair the warp coils.

Sometimes you have to ride a joke if there is someone else around to get a great laugh.
You will get a supporter forever.
Obviously I am a Trekker. There are many of us out there.

I'm givin' her all she's got, Captain!!

[TheBlueOrleans]

Re: What is the dumbest customer comment/question you've heard?

User sees me replacing the CCDB.
Question: "Oh. ... Can I print something?"

Answer: "You certainly may, and when I get the machine back up and running I'll hand it to you."
That happened this morning. CCDB didn't fix the problem anyway. I'm going to blame RightFax.