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Re: Joke of the Day
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Re: Joke of the Day
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Re: Joke of the Day
Bumper sticker on a
senior's car.
I'm speeding because I
have to get there before I
forget where I'm going.A tree is known by its fruit, a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost, he who sows courtesy, reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.Comment
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Re: Joke of the Day
DID YOU KNOW?
In the 90's Arsenal soccer club had a player
called David Dicks. When he was injured,
the Newspaper wrote, "Arsenal to play without Dicks."
The coach was upset so the Newspaper
changed the headline to read
"Arsenal to play with Dicks out"....
A record number of women attended the match.A tree is known by its fruit, a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost, he who sows courtesy, reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.Comment
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Re: Joke of the Day
The missus asked me to be more like
Liverpool during sex.
"What the Fuck" I said,
"Well,you stay on top for ages then come 2nd"
she replied.
Some bastard just pinched a pair of my
wife's knickers off the washing line.
She's not bothered about theknickers but she wants
the 12 pegs back.A tree is known by its fruit, a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost, he who sows courtesy, reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.Comment
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Re: Joke of the Day
An 8 year old girl went to office with her father on "Take Your Kid to work day."
As they were walking around the office the young girl started crying and getting very cranky.
Her father asked what was wrong with her.
As the staff gathered round, she sobbed loudly
"Daddy where are all the clowns that you said you worked with?"A tree is known by its fruit, a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost, he who sows courtesy, reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.Comment
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Re: Joke of the Day
Had to go visit the sperm bank a few days ago....
The woman behind the desk asked me if I
"could you please masturbate in the cup"
I replied "Well I am pretty good but I'm not ready to enter any tournaments yet."A tree is known by its fruit, a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost, he who sows courtesy, reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.Comment
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Re: Joke of the Day
Texting acronyms
can stump even
the best parents:
DAUGHTER: I got an A
in chemistry!
MUM: WTF, well done!
Daughter: Mum what
do you think WTF means?
MUM: Well That's
Fantastic.
MUM: What do IDK,LY &
TTYL mean?
SON: I don't know, love
you, talk to you later.
MUM: Ok I'll ask your sister.A tree is known by its fruit, a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost, he who sows courtesy, reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.Comment
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Re: Joke of the Day
I'm so old, I remember when water was free
and you had to pay for porn.
It was so cold this morning that I actually saw a socialist
with his hands in his own pockets.
Coffee and cocaine.
It seems the only reason
Columbia exists is to wake the rest of the world up...A tree is known by its fruit, a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost, he who sows courtesy, reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.Comment
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Re: Joke of the Day
Just checking on you...
I heard a loud pop and thought you may have pulled your head
out of your arse.
When someone says
"Expect the unexpected"
slap them and say
"You didn't expect that, did you?"
If he is willing to give you the moon and stars,
you should be willing to sacrifice uranus.A tree is known by its fruit, a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost, he who sows courtesy, reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.Comment
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Re: Joke of the Day
I just found out cockfighting involves chickens...six months of training wasted.
I always read my wife's horoscope to see what kind of day
I'm going to have.
I found someone's wallet today, and as a good christan I thought,"What would Jesus do?"
So I turned it into wine.A tree is known by its fruit, a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost, he who sows courtesy, reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.Comment
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Re: Joke of the Day
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