Joke of the Day

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  • izzynut
    Gov.

    5,000+ Posts
    • Aug 2013
    • 5347

    #6151
    Re: Joke of the Day

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    • izzynut
      Gov.

      5,000+ Posts
      • Aug 2013
      • 5347

      #6152
      Re: Joke of the Day

      ATT00014.jpeg

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      • izzynut
        Gov.

        5,000+ Posts
        • Aug 2013
        • 5347

        #6153
        Re: Joke of the Day

        ATT00013.jpeg

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        • slimslob
          Retired

          Site Contributor
          25,000+ Posts
          • May 2013
          • 36894

          #6154
          Re: Joke of the Day

          Originally posted by izzynut
          Because I care . . .



          MEDICAL TEST:
          STARE INTO THE CAT'S EYES FOR 10 SECONDS



          [ATTACH=CONFIG]51843[/ATTACH]


          NOW STARE IN THIS PUPPY'S EYES FOR 10 SECONDS ..
          [ATTACH=CONFIG]51844[/ATTACH]

          Your CAT SCAN and LAB TESTS are now Complete.

          [ATTACH=CONFIG]51845[/ATTACH]
          CAT Scan And LAB Test came from a post that Lagonda made to this thread over 7 years ago post #2757
          A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As
          she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his
          stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.

          After a moment or two, the vet
          shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles,
          has passed away."

          The distressed woman wailed,
          "Are you sure?"
          "Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied
          the vet..

          "How can you be so sure?" she
          protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or
          something."

          The vet rolled his eyes, turned
          around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later
          with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on
          in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his
          front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from
          top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and
          shook his head.

          The vet patted the dog on the
          head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he
          returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also
          delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat
          back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and
          strolled out of the room.

          The vet looked at the
          woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most
          definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."

          The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and
          produced a bill, which he handed to the woman..

          The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she
          cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!"

          The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it,
          the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the
          Cat Scan, it's now $150."

          Comment

          • tsbservice
            Field tech

            Site Contributor
            5,000+ Posts
            • May 2007
            • 7926

            #6155
            Re: Joke of the Day

            Originally posted by slimslob
            CAT Scan And LAB Test came from a post that Lagonda made to this thread over 7 years ago post #2757
            Good catch slim!

            P.S.
            He(Lagonda) also drives Mazda 👌
            A tree is known by its fruit, a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost, he who sows courtesy, reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.
            Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.

            Comment

            • slimslob
              Retired

              Site Contributor
              25,000+ Posts
              • May 2013
              • 36894

              #6156
              Re: Joke of the Day

              Originally posted by izzynut
              [ATTACH=CONFIG]51848[/ATTACH]
              You know those signs you see on the dispensers fro toilet seat protectors that say "First up, Then pull down" They are incomplete phrases. They should say:
              First Pull Up Your Skirt
              Then Pull down Your Panties

              Comment

              • slimslob
                Retired

                Site Contributor
                25,000+ Posts
                • May 2013
                • 36894

                #6157
                Re: Joke of the Day

                Comment

                • slimslob
                  Retired

                  Site Contributor
                  25,000+ Posts
                  • May 2013
                  • 36894

                  #6158
                  Re: Joke of the Day

                  Comment

                  • izzynut
                    Gov.

                    5,000+ Posts
                    • Aug 2013
                    • 5347

                    #6159
                    Re: Joke of the Day

                    image011.jpg

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                    • izzynut
                      Gov.

                      5,000+ Posts
                      • Aug 2013
                      • 5347

                      #6160
                      Re: Joke of the Day

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                      • izzynut
                        Gov.

                        5,000+ Posts
                        • Aug 2013
                        • 5347

                        #6161
                        Re: Joke of the Day

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                        • izzynut
                          Gov.

                          5,000+ Posts
                          • Aug 2013
                          • 5347

                          #6162
                          Re: Joke of the Day

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                          • izzynut
                            Gov.

                            5,000+ Posts
                            • Aug 2013
                            • 5347

                            #6163
                            Re: Joke of the Day

                            ATT1.jpg

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                            • izzynut
                              Gov.

                              5,000+ Posts
                              • Aug 2013
                              • 5347

                              #6164
                              Re: Joke of the Day

                              image002.jpg

                              Comment

                              • izzynut
                                Gov.

                                5,000+ Posts
                                • Aug 2013
                                • 5347

                                #6165
                                Re: Joke of the Day

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