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Re: Joke of the Day
I have yet to see Republicans cry over election results like I did the liberal journalists do when they realized that the Hildebeast had lost. They actually broke down in tears on screen.
I don't see Republicans wanting historical landmarks removed because some liberal might have their feelings hurt.
You liberals are always crying when someone posts something that hurts your feelings. Other than bsm2, you are the biggest cry baby of them all. You are constant crying about things that Billy posts.Comment
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Re: Joke of the Day
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Re: Joke of the Day
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Re: Joke of the Day
An old geezer became very bored in retirement and decided to open a medical clinic.
He put a sign up outside that said: "Dr. Geezer's clinic. Get your treatment for $500, if not cured, get back $1,000."
Doctor "Young," who was positive that this old geezer didn't know beans about medicine, thought this would be a great opportunity to get $1,000. So he went to Dr.Geezer's clinic.
Dr. Young: "Dr.Geezer, I have lost all taste in my mouth. Can you please help me?
Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in Dr. Young's mouth."
Dr. Young: Aaagh !! -- "This is Gasoline!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your taste back. That will be $500.
Dr. Young gets annoyed and goes back after a couple of days figuring to recover his money.
Dr. Young: "I have lost my memory, I cannot remember anything."
Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in the patient's mouth."
Dr. Young: "Oh, no you don't, -- that is Gasoline!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your memory back. That will be $500."
Dr. Young (after having lost $1000) leaves angrily and comes back after several more days.
Dr.Young: "My eyesight has become weak --- I can hardly see anything!"
Dr. Geezer: "Well, I don't have any medicine for that so, here's your $1000 back." (giving him a $10 bill).
Dr. Young: "But this is only $10!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You got your vision back!; That will be $500."
Moral of story -- Just because you're "Young" doesn't mean that you can outsmart an "old Geezer"
Remember: Don't make old people mad. We don't like being old in the first place, so it doesn't take much to tick us off.
Enjoy your day!!Comment
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Re: Joke of the Day
Amen... we old Geezers have seen all the tricks..
An old geezer became very bored in retirement and decided to open a medical clinic.
He put a sign up outside that said: "Dr. Geezer's clinic. Get your treatment for $500, if not cured, get back $1,000."
Doctor "Young," who was positive that this old geezer didn't know beans about medicine, thought this would be a great opportunity to get $1,000. So he went to Dr.Geezer's clinic.
Dr. Young: "Dr.Geezer, I have lost all taste in my mouth. Can you please help me?
Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in Dr. Young's mouth."
Dr. Young: Aaagh !! -- "This is Gasoline!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your taste back. That will be $500.
Dr. Young gets annoyed and goes back after a couple of days figuring to recover his money.
Dr. Young: "I have lost my memory, I cannot remember anything."
Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in the patient's mouth."
Dr. Young: "Oh, no you don't, -- that is Gasoline!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your memory back. That will be $500."
Dr. Young (after having lost $1000) leaves angrily and comes back after several more days.
Dr.Young: "My eyesight has become weak --- I can hardly see anything!"
Dr. Geezer: "Well, I don't have any medicine for that so, here's your $1000 back." (giving him a $10 bill).
Dr. Young: "But this is only $10!"
Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You got your vision back!; That will be $500."
Moral of story -- Just because you're "Young" doesn't mean that you can outsmart an "old Geezer"
Remember: Don't make old people mad. We don't like being old in the first place, so it doesn't take much to tick us off.
Enjoy your day!!
Most of them we invented!
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Re: Joke of the Day
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A tree is known by its fruit, a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost, he who sows courtesy, reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.Comment
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Re: Joke of the Day
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Re: Joke of the Day
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Re: Joke of the Day
It snowed last night.....
We received about 2 inches of snow and ...
8:00 am: I made an ordinary traditional looking snowman.
8:10 - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.
8:25 - So, I made a snow woman.
8:30 - My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified women everywhere.
8:40 - The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snowmen instead.
8:45 - The transgender man--woman--person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts.
8:55 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and are not used to decorate snow figures.
9:05 - I was being called a racist because the snow couple is white.
9:15 - I used food coloring to make one of the snow couple a different color and be more racially inclusive.
9:20 - Then accused of using a black face on the snow person.
9:27 - The middle eastern gent across the road demanded the snow woman be completely covered.
9:40 - The police arrived saying someone had been offended.
9:42 - The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needed to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.
9:48 - The neighborhood "council on equality" officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.
9:50 - TV news crew from ABC showed up. I was asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I replied "Snowballs" and I am now a sexist.
10:03 - I was on the news as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe, and sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.
10:05 - I was asked if I have any accomplices. Later my children were taken by social services.
10:29 - Far left protesters offended by everything marched down the street demanding that I be arrested.
10:45 - The boss called and fired me because of the negative association with work that had been all over social media.
11:00 - I cry into my drink because all I wanted to do was build a snowman...
Moral: There ain't no moral to this story. It is what this world has become because we pay attention to a bunch of snowflakes.
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