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How did the Peanuts say it AAAUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Comment
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I had a teacher at a High school come up to me, working on a PANASONIC copier, he asks.... So, how is our xerox? I responded, I dunno, this is a PANASONIC.
I had a couple of accounts when I worked in California say something similar, they looked at me walking into the place and say, the xerox guy is here, I stopped, turned around and asked Where?, they looked at me puzzled and said, you, I said, humm, I work on Kyocera machines, all the cases, they were teachers High School level or higher (college).
And to think our future is learning from them :-)Comment
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a number of years ago i had a really stroppy customer, who i used to take a lot of sh*t from. i was fixing her copier and she said i couldn't go until i had fixed it, even if it took all night, by this time i'd had enough, so i just said "fine...which side of the bed do you want!!!" after her initial shock..she just burst out laughing...never had any sh*t form her again....we became good friends...never did find out which side she preferredTip for the day; Treat every problem as your dog would.....If you cant eat it or f*ck it....then p*ss on it & walk away...Comment
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I had a service order come through last week and I wanted to share the problem description with all you great techs:
---- Problem Explanation ----
**BILL EXTENDED WARRANTY** CONSTANT LOAD MP TRAY ERROR.
ABLE TO CLEAR IT OUT FOR IT TO SHOW UP RANDOMLY IN THE NOT TOO DISTANT FUTURE. PLEASE EXCHANGE."The Serenity Prayer" . . .
God grant me the serenity to accept stupid people , the courage to not waste my time and energy on them , and the wisdom to know that I cannot fix STUPID .Comment
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What is the dumbest customer comment / question I've heard?
Any post by aab1!!!“I think you should treat good friends like a fine wine. That’s why I keep mine locked up in the basement.” - Tim HawkinsComment
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I was once called out to a Japanese School in Sydney, where they had a Xerox Vivace655. This machine had a language button that you could press and it would change the UI to Japanese. The call was because the feature didnt work.
I get there and the operator wasnt available. I go to the machine, push the button and it changes to Japanese. I leave. The next day, same thing, still no operator available, I leave. This goes on three more times, still without seeing the teacher who is putting the calls in. Finally the teacher says "dont send that tech again, he doesnt know what he is doing!"
Obviously, my boss lets me go out, but he comes too.
We wait for an age for the operator to arrive. She comes in, pushes the language button. Puts documents in the handler (written in English) and copies. The copies come out in English and she goes off her nut...
Even my boss couldnt keep a straight face on that call.Comment
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"Many years ago I chased a woman for almost two years, only to discover that her tastes were exactly like mine: we both were crazy about girls."
---Groucho Marx
Please do not PM me for questions related to Konica Minolta hardware.
I will not answer requests or questions there.
Please ask in the KM forum for the benefit of others to see the question and give their input.
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I have a librarian say how their machine kept jamming in the paper tray. Over the phone I asked them if they checked the paper they loaded in the trays etc before I turn up. She assured me there was nothing wrong with the paper!
Turned up and found an A3 notepad loaded in the tray. They had taken off the cardboard front first but the fact that all the pages are glued together may have something to do with why the paper would not leave the tray???
Was installing a new machine at a privet school. already taken the old machine away and was OPENING THE BOX of the new machine. Teacher with a "head of science" badge walks into the room and ask if there machine has broken down? and complained about how the other machines are out of action too. Yes we was replacing all of them.
Had a print shop operator complain that the machine kept hold punching tray 5 without them telling the machine too. Yes there was pre-hole punched paper in tray 5, same operator cut a hole into a bizhub pro c6500 toner bottle and poured in C451 toner. taped up the hold and put it into the machine. They then have problems with copy quality couple of random codes (mostly tcr) and printing completely yellow pages. would not believe me when I told him it was his fault! Instead kept going on about how clever he is...Comment
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is he any relation to aab1?"Many years ago I chased a woman for almost two years, only to discover that her tastes were exactly like mine: we both were crazy about girls."
---Groucho Marx
Please do not PM me for questions related to Konica Minolta hardware.
I will not answer requests or questions there.
Please ask in the KM forum for the benefit of others to see the question and give their input.
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I'd tell her she'd need to order the kanji character pack, but the brand didn't manufacture them any longer.' "But the salesman said . . ." The salesman's an asshole!'
Mascan42
'You will always find some Eskimo ready to instruct the Congolese on how to cope with heat waves.'
Ibid
I'm just an ex-tech lurking around and spreading disinformation!Comment
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A customers ... I swear most of them should be banned from using a copier, would make our lives a lot easier!
Story 1:
We get a call for a copier that makes blank copies. I go to the school where the machine is located, the teacher that called isn't there anymore. I make a few test copies, everything works. I do a quick maintenance and show the principal that the machine works perfectly. Next day same call: still blank copies. I drive all the way back to the school, teacher still isn't there. I make some copies and everything is fine. The teacher arrives complaining how this machine refuses to work and how awful it is. The usual. I ask the teacher to show me what the problem is. She puts the page on the glass, text facing upwards....
Of course the copier makes blank of the equally blank side of paper that is on the glass...
story 2:
I'm at the office, phone rings, another panicking teacher: 'The machine stopped working!'
me 'Ok, does the machine show an error message or is there a paper jam?'
teacher: 'I'll have a look.... it say's 'out of paper' '
me 'Well, I guess you have to put some paper in the machine then'
teacher: 'Will you send a tech for that please?'
me '...'
Story 3
I'm on the phone trying to explain how change some user setting on an older Ricoh machine ...
me '... and then you push '2' on your keypad'
client 'erm ... where is that?'
me 'On the right of your display you should see the keypad'
client 'oh I see'
me 'So push '2' '
client 'where is that?'
me 'between '1' and '3' sir'
client 'Nope, can't find it'
me 'nevermind sir, I'll come and change it for you'
Sometimes it's just faster to drive all the way to the client ....
Story 4:
Not really copier related but still funny imho. The girl that works in one of our copy shops calls me to tell me that the CDROM drive on her pc jams. Since I double as IT guy, I find a new CDROM drive and I go to the copy shop. When I arrive I ask her to show me the problem. 'So the drive only opens half way, look!' She pushes the button, drive opens and smacks against the edge of the desk. I move the PC a little bit and I ask her to try again. 'Oh it works now!'Comment
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