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Mystic Crystal Revelations -
Re: Joke of the Day
Jingle Bells Batman Smells, Robin laid an egg. Bat mobile lost a wheel and Penguin got away...............................Mystic Crystal RevelationsComment
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Re: Joke of the Day
How to wash a cat
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Re: Joke of the Day
My boss got this as an email.
Subject: Please take a cab
A man was out for an evening with friends and had several cocktails followed by some rather nice red wine. Feeling jolly he had the sense to know that he might be slightly over the limit.
That's when he did something he had never done before - he took a cab home. Sure enough on the way home there was a police roadblock, but since it was a cab they waved it past and hge arrived home safely without incident.
This was a real surprise as he had never driven a cab before. He didn't know where he got it aand now that it's in his garage, he doesn't know what to do with it.Comment
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Re: Joke of the Day
An elderly man in Oklahoma calls his son in New York and says, "I hate to
ruin your day son, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are getting
a divorce; 45 years of marriage... and that much misery is enough!" "Dad,
what are you talking about?" the son yells. "We can't stand the sight of
each other any longer," the old dad explained. "We're sick of each other,
and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Hong Kong and
tell her!". Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone.
"Like heck they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take care of this."
She calls her elderly father immediately, and screams at him, "You are not
getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my
brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a
thing, you hear me?" she yelled as she hung up the phone. The old man hangs
up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay", he says, "it's all set. They're
both coming for Christmas and paying their own air-fare."Comment
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Some days, it's just not worth chewing through the restraintsComment
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Re: Joke of the Day
GEE !!! Ya gotta love the ENGRISH in that one !"The Serenity Prayer" . . .
God grant me the serenity to accept stupid people , the courage to not waste my time and energy on them , and the wisdom to know that I cannot fix STUPID .Comment
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Re: Joke of the Day
A blonde heard that milk baths would make her more beautiful, so she left a note for her milkman to leave 15 gallons of milk.
When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 1.5 gallons, so he knocked on the door to clarify the point.
The blonde came to the door and the milkman said, "I found your Note to leave 15 gallons of milk. Did you mean 1.5 gallons?" The blonde said, "I want 15 gallons of milk. I'm going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath".
The milkman asked, "Do you want it pasteurized?"
The blonde said, "No, just up to my boobs."Comment
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The greatest enemy of knowledge isn't ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge. Stephen HawkingComment
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Re: Joke of the Day
Top 20 Reasons Why Chocolate is Better Than Men
1. Chocolate is always there for you when you need it!There are 10 types of people in this world, those who understand binary maths and those who don'tComment
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Re: Joke of the Day
Ten things men know about women.
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10. They have breasts.Some days, it's just not worth chewing through the restraintsComment
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Re: Joke of the Day
OK, I wasn't going to post this one, but you've just declared war LOL
Top Ten Reasons Why a Vibrator Is Better Than a Man- It keeps going, and going, and going. A vibrator can keep going as long as it takes to satisfy you. All it needs is a power supply, and batteries are a lot cheaper and easier to get than Viagra.
- Vibrators can have more than one speed. Most guys have two settings: full speed and off. Vibrators have variable controls and let you pick the pace and intensity.
- Vibrators are designed for your pleasure.A penis is designed for procreation and male sexual pleasure, not to stimulate the clitoris and bring a woman to orgasm. A vibrator, on the other hand, was created with women in mind. Use the right tool for the job.
- No germs and no sperm.
- Vibrators are easy to replace.
There are 10 types of people in this world, those who understand binary maths and those who don'tComment
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