Joke of the Day

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  • fixthecopier
    ALIEN OVERLORD

    2,500+ Posts
    • Apr 2008
    • 4714
    #3751
    Re: Joke of the Day

    My wife told me to get those dick pills.
    She told me to get those pills that make your dick standup.
    Man was she surprised when I came back from the pharmacy with diet pills
    Pls help, I'm locked out of my house
    The greatest enemy of knowledge isn't ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge. Stephen Hawking

      Comment

      • slimslob
        Retired

        Site Contributor
        25,000+ Posts
        • May 2013
        • 36905
        #3752
        Re: Joke of the Day

          Comment

          • slimslob
            Retired

            Site Contributor
            25,000+ Posts
            • May 2013
            • 36905
            #3753
            Re: Joke of the Day

              Comment

              • fixthecopier
                ALIEN OVERLORD

                2,500+ Posts
                • Apr 2008
                • 4714
                #3754
                Re: Joke of the Day

                A lion would never drive drunk...
                But a tiger wood
                The greatest enemy of knowledge isn't ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge. Stephen Hawking

                  Comment

                  • Lagonda
                    Service Manager

                    Site Contributor
                    1,000+ Posts
                    • Aug 2008
                    • 1649
                    #3755
                    Re: Joke of the Day

                    Originally posted by fixthecopier
                    A lion would never drive drunk...
                    But a tiger wood
                    Groan.jpg
                    At least 50% of IT is a solution looking for a problem.

                      Comment

                      • slimslob
                        Retired

                        Site Contributor
                        25,000+ Posts
                        • May 2013
                        • 36905
                        #3756
                        Re: Joke of the Day
                        An old farmer gets pulled over by a state trooper.




                          Comment

                          • bob marley
                            Service Manager

                            1,000+ Posts
                            • Jan 2012
                            • 1339
                            #3757
                            Re: Joke of the Day

                            old phone[1].jpg
                            Live for yourself and you will live in vain. Live for others, and you will live again

                              Comment

                              • techwurk
                                Trusted Tech

                                Site Contributor
                                100+ Posts
                                • Jul 2016
                                • 127
                                #3758
                                Re: Joke of the Day

                                She left a note on the fridge saying "This isn't working, goodbye"

                                But I opened it and it works just fine
                                Attached Files
                                When I started servicing copiers they used toaster ovens for fusers.....I'm old

                                  Comment

                                  • techwurk
                                    Trusted Tech

                                    Site Contributor
                                    100+ Posts
                                    • Jul 2016
                                    • 127
                                    #3759
                                    Re: Joke of the Day

                                    I was on my way to a service call in town the other day where I have to park and then walk a block to the customer.

                                    So I was walking along the sidewalk and stepped in a big pile of dog crap

                                    Now at this point i'm looking at my foot when a lady is walking by and steps in it too.

                                    I said to her "I just did that" She punched me square in the nose and called me a bastard
                                    When I started servicing copiers they used toaster ovens for fusers.....I'm old

                                      Comment

                                      • NeoMatrix
                                        Senior Tech.

                                        2,500+ Posts
                                        • Nov 2010
                                        • 3514
                                        #3760
                                        Re: Joke of the Day

                                        The Sargent at arms orders his small platoon along a narrow mountain trail.
                                        The point guard comes to a holt an points down at the ground.
                                        The Sargent learns over his shoulder and says "whats that on the ground?"

                                        PG: It looks like dog poo.
                                        SG: Feel it...
                                        PG: What!
                                        SG: That's an order.
                                        PG: It feels like dog poo.
                                        SG: Smell it...
                                        PG: What!!!!....
                                        SG: That's an order.
                                        PG: Smells like dog poo.
                                        SG: Taste it...
                                        PG: WWHHHATTTT!!!!!
                                        SG: That's an order...
                                        PG: Pppfff.., it tastes like dog poo.. ppthff!!
                                        SG: Whew!, thank god we didn't step in it.
                                        SG: FORRWARRD!!!!
                                        Inauguration to the "AI cancel-culture" fraternity 1997...
                                        •••••• •••[§]• |N | € | o | M | Δ | t | π | ¡ | x | •[§]••• ••••••

                                          Comment

                                          • ZOOTECH
                                            Senior member of CRS

                                            Site Contributor
                                            2,500+ Posts
                                            • Jul 2007
                                            • 3374
                                            #3761
                                            Re: Joke of the Day

                                            Originally posted by NeoMatrix
                                            The Sargent at arms orders his small platoon along a narrow mountain trail.
                                            The point guard comes to a holt an points down at the ground.
                                            The Sargent learns over his shoulder and says "whats that on the ground?"

                                            PG: It looks like dog poo.
                                            SG: Feel it...
                                            PG: What!
                                            SG: That's an order.
                                            PG: It feels like dog poo.
                                            SG: Smell it...
                                            PG: What!!!!....
                                            SG: That's an order.
                                            PG: Smells like dog poo.
                                            SG: Taste it...
                                            PG: WWHHHATTTT!!!!!
                                            SG: That's an order...
                                            PG: Pppfff.., it tastes like dog poo.. ppthff!!
                                            SG: Whew!, thank god we didn't step in it.
                                            SG: FORRWARRD!!!!
                                            How do I get a copy of that "GROAN" button?
                                            "You can't trust your eyes, if your mind is out of focus" --

                                              Comment

                                              • Phil B.
                                                Field Supervisor

                                                10,000+ Posts
                                                • Jul 2016
                                                • 22798
                                                #3762
                                                Re: Joke of the Day

                                                My girlfriend the other day said " Honey I think you need to go to the doctor and get some of those pills to make you hard".
                                                So the next day I went, came back and threw her a bottle of diet pills.
                                                I am searching for a new girlfriend.

                                                  Comment

                                                  • Lagonda
                                                    Service Manager

                                                    Site Contributor
                                                    1,000+ Posts
                                                    • Aug 2008
                                                    • 1649
                                                    #3763
                                                    Re: Joke of the Day

                                                    Originally posted by ZOOTECH
                                                    How do I get a copy of that "GROAN" button?
                                                    Here you go


                                                    Groan.jpg
                                                    At least 50% of IT is a solution looking for a problem.

                                                      Comment

                                                      • bob marley
                                                        Service Manager

                                                        1,000+ Posts
                                                        • Jan 2012
                                                        • 1339
                                                        #3764
                                                        Re: Joke of the Day

                                                        JOKE.jpg
                                                        Live for yourself and you will live in vain. Live for others, and you will live again

                                                          Comment

                                                          • mthomasebs
                                                            Technician

                                                            50+ Posts
                                                            • May 2017
                                                            • 65
                                                            #3765
                                                            Re: Joke of the Day

                                                            What does Mr Miyagi do to relax?

                                                            Whacks off.

                                                              Comment

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