Joke of the Day

[Akitu]

Re: Joke of the Day

A young artist exhibits his work for the first time and a well known art critic is in attendance.
The critic says to the young artist, "would you like my opinion on your work?"
"Yes, " says the artist.
"It's worthless," says the critic
The artist replies, "I know, but tell me anyway."

[fixthecopier]

Re: Joke of the Day

[fixthecopier]

Re: Joke of the Day

Once upon a time, and far, far away lived a beautiful Queen with voluptuous breasts. Nick the Dragon slayer knew that the penalty for his desire would be death should he try to touch them.
One day Nick revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Horatio the Physician, who was the King's chief doctor. Horatio the Physician, exclaimed that he could arrange for Nick the Dragon Slayer to satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1, 000 gold coins to arrange it.
Without pause, Nick the Dragon Slayer readily agreed to the scheme. The next day, Horatio the Physician made a batch of itching powder and poured a little bit into the Queen's brassiere while she bathed. Soon after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense.
Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident, Horatio the Physician informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva, if applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch, and that tests had shown that only the saliva of Nick the Dragon Slayer would work as the antidote to cure the itch.
The King quickly summoned Nick the Dragon Slayer. Horatio the Physician then slipped Nick the Dragon Slayer the antidote for the itching powder, which he quickly put into his mouth, and for the next four hours, Nick worked passionately on the Queen's voluptuous and magnificent breasts.
The Queen's itching was eventually relieved, and Nick the Dragon Slayer left satisfied and touted as a hero. Upon returning to his chamber, Nick the Dragon Slayer found Horatio the Physician demanding his payment of thousand gold coins.
With his obsession now satisfied, Nick the Dragon Slayer couldn't have cared less and, knowing that Horatio the Physician could never report this matter to the King, with a laugh just told him to get lost. The next day, Horatio the Physician slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder into the King's underwear. The King immediately summoned Nick the Dragon Slayer...
Continued......

[slimslob]

Re: Joke of the Day

[emujo]

Re: Joke of the Day

Customer was asking for new Host names for their KM devices to conform with their naming convention but some of their requested names were too long to add. We asked them to shorten some of the names.This is a Sheriiff Office and the department was Crime Analysis, they wanted "crimeanalysisC368" but this was also to long so the IT rep shortened it to "Crime-Anal", made a label and stuck it to the front panel. The department was in tears when they saw what IT had done...Emujo

[fixthecopier]

[slimslob]

Re: Joke of the Day

[fixthecopier]

Re: Joke of the Day

A man approached a very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and said, "I've lost my wife here in the supermarket." "Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?"
The woman looked puzzled. "Why talk to me?" she asked.
"Because every time I talk to a woman with tits like yours, my wife appears out of nowhere!"

[Iowatech]

Re: Joke of the Day

How to act if you're fired.

[fixthecopier]

[Lagonda]

Re: Joke of the Day

Come on Mr Administrator, please supply a "groan" button

[slimslob]

Re: Joke of the Day

[fixthecopier]

Re: Joke of the Day

I used to have a housekeeper. It was my ex-wife. She was real good at keeping the house.

[fixthecopier]

Re: Joke of the Day

Come on Mr Administrator, please supply a "groan" button

Well, I was going to tell you about the time I got arrested for refusing to take a nap. They said I was resisting a rest.

[slimslob]

Re: Joke of the Day